Romancing the Dryer

What a great way to work up the day!

Somebody gave me some fudge brownies at 10:00 a.m. I had two servings, in fact. I placed them in a tissue paper to avoid spoiling my office uniform and my fingers.

Twilight zone kicked in when one of the brownies fell on my shirt, tumbling all the way down to my pants! I have multiple stains all over my entire uniform. Hmmmm..... Think of me as a kid who just ate tons of chocolate cookies with chocolate stains all over the face. The only difference is that my stains had a wider coverage. I should sue the brownie for multiple homicide!

Frantic to rid my light-colored pants off the stains, I thought of going to the wash room and wipe it off with a tissue paper. It was really disgusting! It's as if my genitalia just had a bout with diarrhea! Talk about exiting the wrong hole!

So I did, with a little tissue and some soap. I tried so hard to eliminate the stains. Unfortunately, it left my pants all worked up with water stains. Now, I didn't look like someone who just had penile diarrhea, but one who doesn't have control of his bladder! I thought, "I couldn't go out and tell everybody how cool it is to pee in my pants!" What to do?

Think Mr. Bean! I was left with no other option but to romance the dryer! Yup, that is what romancing the dryer is all about. Putting your lower body under the dryer, moving in a front and back motion (or semi-up and down motion) to make sure that all the water stains are dried off. It was a good thing no one saw me in the wash room. I would have been mortified, errr I should say, that person might be mortified! He would simply think that I was desperate, so desperate that I simply gave in to lust and contented myself with just a dryer.

Hmmm.... I am just wondering what household appliance to romance next time.