The Cerebro

A Tribute to a Friend

2008-09-18T17:05:00.000+08:00

It's another one of those rainy nights. As usual, I'm sitting here in Starbucks, whiling my time surfing the Internet as I wait for my cousin's arrival. I will be picking him up at the airport in about 3 hours.

But my blog tonight isn't about the rain, or the Basic Black Iced Tea I am having here in Starbucks. It is about a friend I have who will be celebrating her special day tomorrow.

No, idiot! She's not getting married yet! Tomorrow is her birthday! She'll be turning 30 something. (You're secret's safe with me, kiddo!)

I recall seeing her in school back in college. She used to sign our enrollment forms, being a trustworthy helper to the school administrators.

In 1999, I saw her again and got reacquainted as I applied for my first and only job as of yet. She works with me until now.

During our first few days as officemates, we got together quite well, with a little fights here and there. I remember our first major "fight," when I said something offensive about her (and being the naive me, I never thought it was offensive). We became friends again when I got her this cross-stitch kit of an anime character (or so I thought ... she claims that she had forgiven me even before I bought her the kit).

Through the years, we would go out and have a group outing with some of our best friends. Normally, we would schedule it around the date of my birthday. Hence, it became known as my birthday outing. During her birthdays, we would normally celebrate it in her house, until a few years back, when the parties stopped for some reason.

Through the 10 years I've worked with her, we had gone through a lot ... summer outings, trips to the North (Bataan, Baguio, etc) and to the South (Batangas, Puerto Galera, etc.), trips abroad (Australia, Singapore), badminton games every Monday night, R-rated movies with another one of my best friends, going to the mall window shopping, and so much more!

Here's to you, Marti! Thanks for all the fun times (and not-so-fun times) we've had! Happy birthday, kiddo!

Hosting with a celebrity

2008-08-27T14:14:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since my last post. It's not that I don't have much to say, 'coz there are a lot of stories to tell. It's just that I've been so caught up in work lately that as soon as I get home, I only have time for Furby.

Anyway, last Saturday's office event is worth recounting, considering that something first happened to me. Sure, you would probably hear me hosting a wedding reception, or probably a Christmas party. Some people say I am good at it, what, with my stage presence and my sometimes funny antics. Last Saturday was no exception. As with all our previous events, I also did the voice over for our opening number and the introduction of our host, local celebrity Yayo Aguila. I also did voice overs for plugs throughout the day. Yeah, I once again hosted the pre-event games, and I should say, this event's audience-respondents were hilariously classical!

What sets this hosting job apart from the other events I've handled is that last Saturday, I got the chance to co-host a portion of the program with a celebrity, our host Ms. Aguila. Somehow, the euphoria of interacting with someone popular made me jittery at first--but hey, need I show that to her or to the audience?

In any case, the portion went on smoothly. It was as if I was hosting with a long-time friend. Our host was very warm and friendly, making the entire stint comfortable for me. I got through that day thinking how opportune I am to act as if I was one of them (celebrities), mingling and hobnobbing with them (of course, actress Bianca Lapus was there as well). Is this the start of something big for me? Will this be my ticket to showbusiness? Ha ha! We'll just wait and see!

My Blog Inspirations

2008-08-13T10:47:00.000+08:00

I've been trying to recall where I got my inspiration for coming up with an online journal, a.k.a. blog. For quite some time, I had my friend, Orange, to thank for this. You see, her blog entries are just so hilarious! (You'll find out what I'm talking about when you visit her orangeexpress blog site.) She surely inspired me to come up with something similar, albeit mine is more on the emo-mushy side, sometimes pretending to be witty, sometimes bordering on corny. Nevertheless, I try to make it a point to write about something that crossed my mind, something that amazed me, something I've been longing for, or just some random thoughts I'd like to share with others.

Yesterday, however, I was watching some old TV commercials on YouTube and I thought about the TV shows during my growing-up years. I thought about Beverly Hills 90210, Saturday Fun Machine (with such shows as Pandamonium, Fraggle Rock, The Great Space Coaster and the likes), The Twilight Zone, Northern Exposure, Murphy Brown, and so much more. Finally, it hit me! My real inspiration for blogging is not Orange--although she got me started on it. It was Neil Patrick Harris, a.k.a. Doogie Howser, M.D.

In each episode, he would end the show by logging on to his computer, creating an electronic journal of lessons learned for the day or for the week. I vividly remember seeing words typed on a blue screen while his thoughts were being voiced over. The cursor was still that white block that came in after each letter. I recall wanting so much to have my own electronic journal that when my dad bought us a computer at home, I wanted to write about anything and everything under the sun. The problem is, the computer is for everyone in the family, and I had some thoughts that I would just like to keep to myself. Besides, blogs were unheard of at that time, and the only establishments with Internet access are schools. And technology back then was jurassic, so to speak. Anyway, I never bothered to come up with a printed journal as it is too girlie for me.

So here I am now, coming up with my own electronic journal a la Doogie Howser, M.D. Unfortunately, my writing is still restricted to things that are not too personal. I cannot write about the way I feel about somebody, some crazy stuff I'm doing, the way I feel about work ... it will just create chaos! The good thing is I can now creatively "hide" some of these things in the form of word play. But for the other things, I can only reveal them to a few close friends.

"Do dum do do dum. Do dum do do dum. (Okay, so I'm trying hard to replicate the theme song of Doogie Howser, M.D. Pretend you're hearing it the way I am.)

Funny Cab Driver

2008-08-12T09:27:00.002+08:00

On the way back from an interview, my friend, Sean, and I took a cab going back to the office. As soon as we entered the vehicle and told the driver where we wanted to go, the driver immediately turned his radio off and started to ask us if we have already heard about the fruit without peel nor seed, that is very juicy. Thinking that he was about to sell us a new herbal preparation or some other multi-level networking product, I braced myself for the worst. This can't be another one of those uber-low marketing ploys that some companies use, so I thought.

I gave the question much thought and, together with Sean, eventually gave up on the answer. His response? Juicy Fruit Gum (a brand of chewing gum from the makers of Double Mint). I laughed my heart out in relief. And as if that joke wasn't enough, he continued to bombard us with more jokes--and poker-faced at that! Whenever we got the answers right, he would reply with "May tama ka," (You got that right). Here are some of his old, yet timeless jokes:

What do you call people from China? Chinese. How about people from Japan? Japanese. How about people from Taiwan? Taiwanese. And people from Vietnam? Vietnamese.
What the do you call people from Mayon (a town in Albay in the Bicol region)? To which Sean replied: Bicolano? Of course, that's what you call people from the Bicol region, right?
The correct response? Mayonese (which the old driver pronounced as mayonnaise).
What do you call the trinket that ladies wear in their ear? We answered, hikaw, which in English means earring. His response? She-kaw. He-kaw, he explained, are for males. So if a woman wears a he-kaw, she is probably gay.
What do you call a happy chicken? Chicken Joy (a fried chicken brand of Jollibee)
What do you call a small chicken? Knorr Chicken Cubes (a broth cube)
What do you call a chicken's mother? To which I replied, "Inahin!" (Hen). He replied, "Dati 'yun, pinalitan na nila, kahapon lang!" (That was before. They changed it only yesterday!) The answer? Chicken Mami, a kind of Chinese chicken noodle soup.
What do you call a small goat? Kapirang-goat
What do you call a big mole? Mega "Mole" (of course, we know that MegaMall is one of the biggest malls in the country)
What do you call a bigger mole? MOA [SM Mall of Asia (MOA) is said to be the biggest mall in the Philippines]
What do you call a shining mole (in his terms, kumukutitap)? Star "Mole" (a mall opposite SM MegaMall)
What do you call this (pointing to his lower lip), to which I replied "Lip!" And the follow up question, "how about this?" (pointing to his upper lip), to which I replied "Lip?" His reply? Rayt. Lip en rayt.
What do you call this (pointing to his right cheek), to which Sean replied, "Cheek!" And the follow up question, "how about this?" (pointing to his left cheek). Sean replied "Cheven?" Wrong! The correct response is "It" (eight). Because it is cheek (right cheek), cheven (nose), it (left cheek).

The trip was a bit short. But I tell you, had you been in that ride with us, you would be laughing hard, not so much at the jokes but the way the cool old man delivered them. Thank you, Mr. Cab Driver, for making our day!

Searching for the Past

2008-08-07T16:28:00.000+08:00

Early this week, I spent quite some time wondering where my blog posts from my last entry in Blogspot to my second entry in Multiply were. I remember doing a number of them but couldn't quite recall where I posted them. I even went as far as formulating several scenarios, including:

- merely dreaming that I did indeed blog
- I was so caught up with my then girlfriend that I felt like blogging, but actually didn't
- I was too caught up writing articles for work that I thought I was blogging

Finally, I remembered where all the memories went. They're all in Friendster!

My first PDA blog

2008-08-05T17:40:00.000+08:00

I just need to try this out. I haven't tried blogging using my PDA phone before. It's kinda cool, knowing I could blog anytime anywhere I want.

Anyway, I just want to share an important milestone in Furby's life. Last Saturday, I kept him in his play pen so he wouldn't be roaming around my room pooping anywhere. All through Friday night, he didn't poop. Saturday came, and by mid morning, he was whining to be taken out of the play pen. I picked him up and brought him to our laundry area where I laid a sheet of newspaper. He peed there, and after peeing, he pooped. Sunday, the same thing. Monday, the same thing happened.

It's such a nice feeling knowing that you have gone somewhere in toilet training your baby. Next on the list, teaching him how to fetch my slippers without ruining them.

10 things I want to believe

2008-08-05T17:39:00.001+08:00

In anticipation of the X-Files: I Want to Believe screening in Manila this August, I would like to share things that I want to believe. Here goes: I want to believe ...

... that there is life after death. It would be sad if our existence ended here without a happily ever after in some other dimension or plane.
... that there is a someone out there meant for each and everyone, myself included. It doesn't really matter if she's short, dark, has a large nose, snores louder than I do ... if she's meant for me, she's meant for me.
... in aliens. I strongly feel that we are not alone in this universe and that somewhere out there are intelligent beings that can zap the life form off us but are too civilized to do so. I just hope I could see one someday in the flesh. Take me with you!
... in miracles. Somehow, things happen to get me up and going again--unexpected and unexplained things. These small miracles help me survive every day.
... in karma. This follows Newton's Law (is it Newton?), that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. If you push on a wall, the wall pushes you back in the opposite direction. Same thing in life, if you step on somebody, somehow life has a way of getting back at you. As some friends say, karma is digital (it's quick).
... that I'll be famous someday. I've always wanted to be a somebody ever since I was young. I think that someday, either my writing, my acting, or something I will be doing will make me a part of history books.
... that I'll be rich. This goes hand in hand with being famous.
... that despite the constant changes in life, some things will still remain the same no matter what. These things will include friendships, relationships, and the like.
... that I will once again be slim. I know it will entail yet more determination on my end, but I know that it will all be worth it. I've been there before and the emotional gratification of being slim after a lifetime of being "cute" is just so immense.
... that despite things I may have done or will ever do, true friends and family will always be stand by me. Unfortunately, there aren't enough true friends in the world to do that, but I believe some of them still exist.

I think that if you believe in things enough, these things eventually become reality. It's like your mind has some effect on the way things work ... it sort of contributes something to the life force of this earth. This is what you may call faith. Oh, and did I also say that I believe I can be a vampire someday?

Body building mania

2008-08-05T17:38:00.000+08:00

Why are so many people into body building?

Just this morning, down for our usual morning break, my friends and I were talking about building muscles and making the body bigger. We talked about exercises for the triceps, how easy it is to develop the back muscles, and how difficult it is to lose the gut.

Not that I have anything against going to the gym, because I do go to the gym (whenever I feel like it) to aid in my weight loss. And there's no offense meant here for my friends, because I know they have good enough reasons for going to the gym. I am just amazed at how thin people, or even those with well-defined bodies, still go gaga over going to the gym. Isn't having a thin frame enough?

Another one of my dreams is to be stick thin. Who cares if my muscles are not toned or well-defined. The thing is, I want to be stick thin. Even in my lightest (I had the opportunity to weigh in at 165), I wasn't stick thin.

So why are so many people into body building? Health reasons? Nah, I don't think so. Well, possibly for some. Vanity? Probably, for many. After all, it's the evil one's favorite sin [The Devil's Advocate].

Of Mice, Dogs and Man

2008-07-31T11:40:00.001+08:00

I really enjoy having Furby by my side at night. Not that I am into beastiality. I just enjoy having a baby sleep beside me. Last night, I brought home a puppy play pen, which I bought from my friend. Well, that would keep Furby from sleeping in the dark recesses of my room and urinating and pooping all over. Unfortunately, he would whine because he didn't like it there. But that's all part of my puppy training.

Puppy loves
And speaking of pets, I remember my first pet, Sprite. He was a Japanese spitz, whom I adored and went gaga over. But I was only 3 years old when I had him, so he was more like a brother than a baby to me. Unfortunately, when I was around 6 or 7, he went to heaven, leaving me in pieces. We just found him one morning on the roadside, his body pierced with an icepick on the side. We later learned that some drunk guys in our neighborhood didn't like my dog's attitude, so they shut him up--for good. It was a traumatic experience for me, but I never really gave up on the idea of owning pets.

A few year's after Sprite's demise, my dad brought me along to watch a movie with him in old Manila. You know those creepy cinemas where only a handful of people watch? We watched an action flick. After the movie, we passed by an establishment popular for the dogs they sell on the sidewalk. And so, after much bugging, he obliged to buy me not one, but two puppies, whom I named Coca (is it obvious that I have this strange inclination to name my dogs after soda brands?) and Sprite (as a tribute to my fallen pet). After about 2 weeks, Sprite fell ill and soon died. Coca lived on for about 13 or 14 human years to give us more puppies (most of whom were given to friends). And then we had another dog, whose name excapes me (because he's my brother's dog to begin with), who mothered more puppies (Coca was still with us at that time). One of those puppies became my puppy as well, and I named him Murphy. Murphy was a medium-size dog; his father was a German Shepherd that a neighbor owned. When he was about 4 or 5 human years old, he became ill and died, even when the vet regularly came to us for housecalls.

And then we had another Japanese spitz puppy given by an uncle. During his first night at home, I was so excited about our new pet that I tossed him in the air like a baby, catching him with both arms. In my last toss, I accidentally failed to catch him, causing him to land on the pillow where he was sleeping--head first. I thought I killed him because he wasn't breathing anymore. What did I do? I gave him chest compressions and blew air into his mouth. Good thing he regained consciousness. A few months after, though, he died. He was accidentally ran over by our driver right in our own garage!

We had a lot more dogs, all of whom are gone or were given to friends (some were sold). Now, we are left with Stallone (a yellow labrador retriever, son of our chocolate brown labrador retriever Cocoa, who is now under my uncle's care), Whitie (who's not really that white, is in his twilight years--hey, we had him since I was 16, making him about 15 human years old), and of course my Furby.

The birds and the bees
Aside from dogs, I also have had pets of different kinds.
I remember in elementary school, I used to go to a creek in our school and collect these snails. I would take them home in a plastic cup and put them in a fishbowl as soon as I got home. I eventually had to let them go because my folks didn't like the smell, and they said it wasn't natural for the snails to be pets.

There was also this one Christmas where I asked Santa for a pair of bunnies, which Santa gleefully gave me. Of course, I eventually found out that Santa is my mom, who loves animals as well (you've got to hand it to her to allow us to have pets at home despite my dad's disapproval). I could still remember how wide-eyed I was that one December morning, very happy about my new playmates. Unfortunately, they died a year later. I kept them in a big box, and one time, I accidentally (read: purposely) threw in a piece of lit firecracker inside. A few days later, the bunnies died. Cause of death? I believed it was a heart attack.

And then I got these really cool love birds for my 7th birthday. I remember, my mom bought me four of them: one blue, two yellow and one green. Sadly, they disappeared little by little over a span of a year. We found out that a stray cat would sneak up at night and open their cage, snagging them from their silent perch and eating them alive.

In high school, we got this huge aquarium from our uncle who used to have an aruwana. Excited as I was to have another kind of pet, I bought fishes--different species from tetras and angel fishes, to gold fishes and fighter fishes. My mom adored these fishes, but somehow they died one by one because of overcrowding.

One day, on my way home from school, I chanced upon this duckling vendor on the sidewalk. Naturally, I bought one to take home as a pet. At home, thinking that ducks are aquatic birds, I placed the duck on the aquarium and left it there. Imagine my horror when two days after, the duck died. It was probably due to overexhaustion--from all the paddling. I also managed to buy a chick at about the same year. It died the night I brought it home because a cat ate it.

And do you remember those high school experiments you had involving white mice? Well, I got so engrossed in them that I bought about four extra mice for me to take care of. The pet vendor put them in a brown paper bag with holes. Unfortunately, one of them managed to escape in the car. After hours of frantically searching for it, I eventually gave up. And so I was left with three. While transferring them to their cage, one of them escaped again and went inside a mouse hole in the house. The next day, as we rode the car and turned the air conditioner on ... fffrrrrrrr ... shreds of white fur came out of the air conditioner. One mouse down. After a few months, I saw a cute little mouse coming out of the mouse hole. It was a black mouse with blotches of white all over. Probably my little mouse escapee found true love in the whole. As for the other two that I still had? Well, they lived long enough in terms of mouse years to live in the beautiful cage I had for them.

Then in college, my classmate gave me a kitten. It was beautiful. It was pure white, with one eye blue and the other eye green. My dad was really furious that time because cat poop really stinks. Anyway, the anger was short-lived because about a week after, the kitten managed to escape from the house and died enroute to freedom as one of our dogs bit him in the neck.

I also bought a pair of hamsters in college, which I kept in a small aquarium (without the water, of course). Eventually, their love bloomed and gave us four baby hamsterets. Sadly, they disappeared one by one. I later realized that the mommy hamster ate her kids. Eventually, the mommy hamster attacked the daddy hamster, who later died. The mommy hamster was alone until her death a few months after. Talk about marital spats.

And then we had this experiment in college where we needed to find out something about the effect of a particular drug (I can't really recall if it's iodine) on the urine of a guinea pig. We had to shave off a small part of her fur and we had to measure the drug content in the urine. After the experiment, I took home the guinea pig and took care of it. I didn't have much trouble with it except that it made these funny sounds at night. Eventually, it, too, died.

I also bought a fortune lobster, which I displayed in our living room. It was there for a few months, molting about twice before it died. A kid we had over gave him too much to eat. It was too late when I found out about it and by then, the lobster was already dying.

Loving them
I love animals, and I like having them around me. One of my greatest dreams is to have a small petting zoo where everyone can interact with these marvelous creatures. If not, I can have a small farm where all these animals can freely roam around. But until such time that I can amass a fortune to buy all these critters, I have my Furby to tend to. For now, I'm contented with having Furby around, anticipating my walks in the park with him, reading a book under a tree while he lazes beside me. Or playing frisbee with him on the beach. Lucky Furby.

Beach Bum

2005-03-07T17:13:00.000+08:00

So I celebrated my birthday last Saturday without my family. Sad, but true. I just couldn't pass up on a good opportunity to go to the beach at this time of the year when the sun is scorching HOT, HOT, HOT! Besides, I am with some of my best friends (my other best friends are school buddies)--the next best thing to family. And it was definitely a birthday weekend to remember.

We got there relatively early and, after walking around the area, I decided to take my first dip. The waves were crashing like hell and I got washed to shore. My friends were chuckling their hearts out as I checked if my contacts were still on. People around there watched in shock as they thought I got dizzy or something. A second wave had me tumbling and rolling under water, making my friends chuckle more and the people around them more concerned.

I have lots more to tell. I will be updating this later. Now, I have a kiddie party to go to. Until later!

Enough of that!

2005-01-26T08:50:00.000+08:00

Okay, so I am once again your resident jerk. To those whom I consistently blog, my sincerest apologies. It's just that you make me life so colorful and meaningful. And that's you, anonymous!

But enough of that. It's time to refocus my energy on the lighter side of life. From now on, no more writing about sentiments, about friends, about my life in general. Except, of course, in cases where there is a dire need to write about me.

Beginning today, I'll be writing about life's comedy of errors.

I was with a friend yesterday and she told us a story about her household help.

"I was going to a wedding sometime ago and I asked my maid to call a local hair salon for me -- Jun Encarnacion. I told her, 'Could you call up Jun Encarnacion for me. The number is listed in the directory,'" she recounted.

"She came back and told me she couldn't find it! I asked for the directory and asked her where she looked."

"'Isn't it under N for Encarnacion?'" the maid quipped.

My friend almost threw the directory at her in surprise and amusement. At least she made an effort. A for effort (read: ay-fort)?

The Rain After the Rainbow

2005-01-24T14:46:00.000+08:00

People say that all good things must come to an end. In fact, if you think about it technically, all things, no matter if it's good or bad, must really come to an end. Happiness, just like a rainbow, ends abruptly, just like that. Think about the last time you were happy. How fast did it fade? Or did it fade at all or just instantaneously disappeared? How many time has tragedy replaced bliss? Does it always follow that there is rain after a rainbow has appeared?

Contrary to what many people say, life is really a rain after the rainbow thing. Who ever said that there's a rainbow always after the rain? Not in our lives, I don't think so. It's more of like the calm before the storm. Only, what we do feel are momentary blissful episodes followed by a period of tragedy, remorse, guilt or what have you.

I just came back from a weekend trip to a city far south of where I live. I was with some friends and we talked "business." I should say that it was a good trip. It was one of the more memorable local trips I have had for as long as I could remember.

Fast forward to today. A friend got angry at me. A former MBA classmate forgot who I was totally and even asked me if he knows me (now tell me, am I really that forgettable?). And to think it was just two days ago when I had the greatest ride of my life this month. And now, I'm back to the rain, the storm, the tumultuous sea that is life. And the worst thing about today: I am continuously craving for chocolates despite the fact that I'm on a diet. Why do you always crave for something that is not given to you or that you don't have? I guess that merits another blog entry.

Anyway, I promised myself not to be oversly sensitive this year. Who cares if people get mad at me? Who cares if someone forgets my name? No one! And that's just the way it is in this world. Sheesh! I should get a life (thanks to anonymous for this)!

And now, I'm off to search for that next calm. I am once again starting that quest for the next rainbow in my life. Damn. I hate rainbows.

Stag

2005-01-17T13:59:00.000+08:00

I've never been to a stag party before. Nor have I been invited to one.

Yesterday, my friends/badminton buddies were talking about the stag party they held last week for one of our badminton buddies who is getting married this Friday. If only I knew they were coming up with one, I should have insisted on going.

Quite surprisingly, after feeling a little left-out, I was immediately swept back to reality that I have my goals this year, and being too sentimental about things is definitely not one of them. Cool. I just succeeded in psyching myself that there will always be other chances. Besides, I could always throw myself a stag party anytime I want to. It will just be me, with all the perks of a stag party all to myself!

I am a stag, anyway, and I deserve to party!

Miss Flor

2005-01-03T14:26:00.000+08:00

Miss Flor is our household help. She is married and has three kids so there is no hint of infatuation from my side. She is just so funny that her antics deserve a blog entry of its own.

I remember sometime last year when my brothers and me were singing karaoke. She happened to pass by with her broom and listened in awe as we outbelted each other. As my youngest brother ended his song, she commented, "Nice voice! But you need to furlong your notes to make it better." My brothers and me looked at each other in utter amusement. Of course, furlonging it would prolong the beautiful melody, hence the song as well.

And then there was a time when we wanted to go the mall. She told my mother not to go there. "There are so many people in the mall today. There is a sales." And sales would be the year-end sale of the mall to dispose of its holiday apparels.

Yesterday, while doing the grocery, I asked her to get some apples from the fruit section. Normally, a person would get a clear plastic bag from a rack and fill it with apples. The person should then hand the bag over to a grocery personnel to have the bag weighed and stickered with a bar code. As I approached Miss Flor, I noticed that the apples were scattered all over the grocery cart. I asked her why the apples were not in a bag. She told me that they looked for a bag of apples and found none. As you know, the apples were not pre-packed and she was looking for the pre-packed ones. I told her that it needs to be stickered with a bar code. She replied that it already has a sticker, pointing at the label of the apple. I almost dropped the apples because I really wanted to laugh and roll on the floor.

She has a lot more antics but I left them in my Alzheimer's bank. She is really a comic relief and provides the family with a de-stressor every now and then. And that, my friends, is why Miss Flor deserves a space in this blog site.

Reflections

2005-01-03T13:43:00.000+08:00

Long time no blog once again. It has been about two weeks since I last visited this site.

Anyways, happy new year to you, Cerebro! I guess there is no better time to do some reflections on the past year than now. It was indeed a crazy year for me and for the people around me.

On Sentimentalities

The past year has been an emotional roller coaster for me. A lot of sensitivities were sparked inside due to some outside forces. I had a lot of sensitivity issues with friends, with my best friends, with family members and with classmates. It had been hard, trying to control the angst and the feelings of deprivation and rejection. It was so hard that all of those just got loose. Never mind who was at fault, although I must admit that all those bad days were spurred by my insecurities, I just had to vent it out, making me the most transparent person this side of town.

I lost a friend and almost lost one of my best friends somewhere along the way (nope, it wasn't registered in this blog. It happened long before this blog was created). It was a good thing that new relationships were formed and new friendships were established.

On Travels

One of the greatest things that happened to me last year was the opportunity for me to travel to Australia. I got a chance to spend some time with one of my best cousins and a few of my best friends in the land down under. I was also able to visit a southern beach in the country, the world-famous Boracay. It was truly a stormy experience, that beach trip.

On the other hand, there were some trips that I planned on going to but did not materialize. I wanted so much to go to Hong Kong with my best buds. In fact, we were planning it as early as January of 2004. They pushed through with it, I got left behind. Where are your financial rainfalls when you need them?

And then, there was this supposed trip to Thailand just before Christmas. It would have been the perfect opportunity for me to see Phuket in its grandeur. Now, all that is left are remnants of a very wet and submerged graveyard. And truly, I am very thankful that the problems I had last year didn't end up as horrifying as the ordeals of the victims of the tsunami. May their souls rest in peace.

On Weight Loss

I guess one of the greatest achievements I had last year was my significant weight loss. After painstakingly losing about 80 pounds in a span of a year, I was able to reap the physical benefits of the feat during the holiday season. Relatives who only saw me during the holidays were quite surprised by the changed. All I could tell them was, "I'm on drugs!"

As of today, I am still overweight by 10 to 15 pounds. I have an entire year to lose it, though. Slowly but surely.

Resolutions

I don't really believe in resolutions. If it happens, it happens, I say. I do, however, have goals for this year. I intend to travel abroad at least once this year. Hopefully, I could travel abroad more. I also intend to lose 20 pounds more, just to be on the safe side. Hello Home TV Shopping!

I also would like to strive hard to minimize my sentimentalities and being too emotional to a bare minimum. Who would want to lose best friends? I also would like to spend more time with my family, although I have yet to figure out how I can do this.

Financially, I would like to be able to save my first hundred grand, or even my first million. The first is just a stone-throw away. The latter, a shot at the moon. Who knows? I might win the lottery one of these days (wish*wish).

But I guess my greatest goal is to be able to finish my MBA and migrate to Australia either latter part of this year or early next year. My goal is to fix all my papers before the year ends.

And to you, anonymous, it will be another year of intriguing comments for me! My goal would not be to please you but rather generate interesting comments from you.... from all of you (wink*wink).

Here's to another year of blogging!

The Bus Ride

2004-12-16T09:15:00.000+08:00

It's been quite a while since I last entered this site. Actually, it's been almost a month. Not that nothing has been happening to me. It's probably something more of being too busy during the pre-holiday season. Add to that the trauma I received from comments I got from my previous blogs, both within the site and personally.

Frankly, it was one hell of a joyride for me, to see the multiple anonymous comments battling it out like foes in the Jerry Springer show. But for a friend not talking to me after reading my blog is another thing. And that is what made the whole blogging thing traumatic.

On to my story.

Last Monday, I came in to work wearing formal office slacks and a brown shirt. I was wearing my pants too high that one of my friends approached me, handed me a CD case that very much looked like a Bible case, and told me to open the plastic bag I was holding. And then one of them told me to ask for donations as I looked very much like a preacher from another religious sect asking for donations for the church inside a moving bus. "Peace be with you all," I should have said.

After that, I became known to myself as Pastor Don.

Yesterday, I wore a similar get up, that is, high-waisted office pants (black) and a collared shirt. Add to that a pair of black shoes with un-matching white socks. I tell you, it is sooooo Michael Jackson. I wasn't aware that I was wearing white socks until after I reached the office, until someone mentioned it to me! Sheesh!

After playing a very rough game of badminton, I boarded a bus going home. I was really expecting to see a preacher, after so many years of not seeing one, doing his thing in the bus. So there I was, patiently observing the people around me. In front of me were two homosexuals. They weren't together, though. One was a lesbian, the other a gay guy. I thought, "A bus could really hold a diverse mixture of cultures and people." Beside me were a couple groping at each other. Talk about intimacy and privacy!

And then, as we were about to reach our destination, what do I notice? A guy with a back pack handing out envelopes to people! I don't know if it was mere coincidence or fate. He was not the traditional preacher. In fact, he wasn't a preacher at all. He was a representative of some organization for the disabled. I was just in utter amazement at the fact that I came very close to meeting a preacher once again. And what did he do to convince people to give him some donations? He had a small tambourine and he played it while singing some off-tune Christmas carols!

Had I not been too tired last night, I would have stood up, opened a plastic bag and passed it around. I would have begun my new career in spreading the Word of God.

"Brothers and sisters, the end is near. Have you ever thought about where you would want to be in the after life.....? Giving is much better than receiving.... In giving do we receive graces not on earth but on the after life...."

"So please, empty your wallets and donate to my church.... this is a stick-up!"

The Corporate Ghost(s)

2004-11-19T13:16:00.000+08:00

Ghost - a disembodied soul; especially : the soul of a dead person believed to be an inhabitant of the unseen world or to appear to the living in bodily likeness. - Merriam-Webster Online

In the corporate world, there are a lot of ghosts roaming around. These are people who carry with them things of the past: ideologies, things, people... The corporate beings find it hard to move on and accept the changes that are facing them.

Just like ghosts. They say that ghosts are here because they haven't moved on to the next dimension. Either they died of a traumatic death, they haven't fulfilled their mission, or they haven't accepted the fact that they are already dead. Think about the movie Ghost.

Here in the office (we currently moved in), which remained uninhabited for two years or so until last week, I, among a few others, personally saw a physical manifestation of a ghost in its truest sense. I know that someone Anonymous will comment that I am probably just imagining things, that it is a result of my fanciful mind.

Well, let me tell you this. I am not the only one who saw it. And all of us who saw it recounted very similar sightings. It is of a man, probably in his mid-adult stage, wearing a white, long-sleeved shirt, sitting on one of the sofas in the reception area. Even the receptionist saw it a few times, not just once.

And there is also the story of the Accounting personnel who, aside from the man in white sitting in the reception area, saw a silhouette of a man (making him appear wearing black) walking to and fro the hallway.

Another accounting personnel recounted how she heard knockings inside her manager's office while working overtime and seeing someone inside in her peripheral vision. She merely shruuged it off, fearful of what she might actually see.

And then there is the IT personnel, who made sure that the door to the IT room was closed before she went to the other department to fetch someone. Upon passing by the IT room, she noticed that the door was now open.

Finally, the story of one of our artists, although not as significant as the other manifestations, felt someone walking past by him while he was washing his face in the Men's Room.

This is very much post-Halloween, but it happened to us. People may not believe it, especially the sceptics. But I believe what I believe. I know what I saw. I have seen a lot of corporate ghosts before, I'm probably one of them, but all were merely metaphorical corporate ghosts.

This time, they're real.

Categorically Imperative

2004-11-19T13:09:00.000+08:00

A few posts ago, there was an anonymous comment who dissed my personality and the things that happen in my life. Someone, thank heavens, came to my defense. Her name? Categorically Imperative.

Contrary to what the anonymous comment said in the previous post, she is no slut. In fact, she is one of the most intelligent people I know. Yes, she is adventurous, but she has her limitations when it comes to exploring the unexplored. She knows her boundaries.

Categorically Imperative has been, for several years now, been a good friend to me and to our other classmates in the graduate school of business. She has shared with us bits and pieces of her life that she treasures most. She is one of the very few people I would call a true person, who shares her mind on just about anything and everything under the sun. She is the epitome of the woman of today.

So here's to you, Categorically Imperative. Thanks for being a good friend (one of the best I've had in graduate school).

To the bitter anonymous...

2004-11-17T11:58:00.000+08:00

It's saddening to note how some people see my accounts for the day as a form of idolitry, or stalking, or an uncertainty of gender. I recently got a comment (see previous post) that goes as follows:

"if i were The Best Friend (or the wife of The Best Friend), either i'll be totally annoyed or i'll be really scared. the way you idolize him borders on stalking. & to brag about it on your diary? man, that's scary! or downright gay... hmmm... and why the heck would you need or wait for your family's invitation to join your family's vacation? that's soooo loser talk."

I just can't imagine how writing about what happened to me and the reasons for such happenings can be tagged as stalking or idolizing a person. I have lots of best friends. They are the select few who have been with me through the tough times. It just so happens that I have, by far, connected the most with The Best Friend. I just write it as such to identify the person among the rest, no idolitry or stalking intended. And the gender issue... well, it's just plain bull.

I didn't brag. I just wrote.

And, it was not a family trip. It was just my parents and my little sister. I just wanted to go to the province myself. My other brothers were here with me in the city as well.

So to you, anonymous, this one's for you. This is a blog that's dedicated for your effort to dis my blog and me. I am supposing you are one of my best friends. Don't worry, you still are. Despite our differences, amidst our opposing points of view, you will always be one of my best friends. My life, after all, would lose its color without a best friend like you.

Sleeping in the Office

2004-11-15T20:41:00.000+08:00

I got to spend 2 straight nights in the office recently. We transferred buildings, you see. I volunteered to help out, but my best friend was spending the night, so I figured to spend the night there (here) as well. He might need some assistance.

It is quite funny to spend around 23 hours or so in the office (I had to get out about an hour or so each day to go to the gym or to get something to eat). I never imagined myself to be doing so. But it was a welcome thing for me because I got to bond with The Best Friend.

Notice how I wasn't able to post in such a long time? Well, all our servers were down during the entire weekend and the holiday Monday. I am still here in the office with The Best Friend and the wife of The Best Friend (who also happens to be one of my best friends) setting up some PCs and doing whatever we can to be able to officially start work tomorrow.

I am just resting, that's why I got to squeeze in this blog.

I haven't seen my parents for a long time. I won't be able to see them tonight as well, I'm afraid. They would probably be fast asleep when I arrive. I went home yesterday and the other night but they went to some provincial district that my grandmother calls home. I wanted to go with them, but they never invited me.

I guess, I will have to get used to those kinds of things, my family leaving me behind, I mean. Sooner or later, I will have to leave them as well to settle down and have a family of my own. But at the rate I am going, I guess I'll be the last one among us siblings to get settled down.

I need to get back to work now. There are still a number of PCs to set up. The Best Friend beckons! Ciao!

That's Weird!

2004-11-15T20:34:00.000+08:00

I came up with two blogs recently, and, realizing they were very negative blogs, decided to delete them. I figured my friends would get very angry at me with those entries.

Apparently, my friends were able to get a glimpse of my feelings of frustrations and loneliness that night. Even my best friend read it! My best friend who never reads my blog (or so he says)! I wonder why. I really find it weird.

Very weird!

Trick or Treating

2004-10-31T23:01:00.000+08:00

It has been my personal tradition to go Trick or Treat every year with my sister at a posh village south of the Metro.

Three years ago, I just accompanied her with several of my kid cousins doing the rounds inside the village. I, myself, had a loot bag of my own. It was fun. It was the same two years ago when we visited several of those houses with their huge Halloween displays and mini House of Horrors.

Last year, it was more memorable, I suppose. I got to dress up in a scary costume and join my sister, who dressed up as Sadako of The Ring. She was spectacular in that costume, so realistic. People even posed for pictures with her. As for me, I was a dead person who died getting run over by a ten-wheeler truck. Well, because I was sweaty, the foundation wore off just as I boarded the car going to the village. I ended up looking like a faggot wearing lipstick.... a faggot who doesn't know how to apply lipstick very well because it is smeared around my mouth and just a little above my chin. I couldn't be a clown because I didn't have anything on my eyes and my cheeks.

I believe the costume was very much alright despite the draw back. At least, I got to be dressed up as something other than me, although unintentionally--a freaking idiotic faggot. Bah! Who cares? At least I got more candy than I did two or three years ago!

This year, I was very much looking forward to making the rounds again! In fact, I had a costume planned out. I would be going as Count Dracula! Yep, I know it is the lamest thing that someone could think of going as. But I firmly believe that I could be the sleekest Count Dracula you would be seeing this side of town. However, my sister was hesitant to go. For one, she--according to her-- is too old for such child's play. Second, she is sick. I counted on my friends who would be bringing their "adopted" kid brother along. They, however, weren't able to send me an SMS. They had to be elsewhere that day.

I was so frustrated by the idea that I would end up trick or treating alone, I decided to hit the mall with a few friends. I didn't even bother to don a costume. In the mall, I saw children walking in and out of the shops. They were Trick or Treating!

I mustered enough courage and walked in a shop. I fell in line and I proudly said, "Trick or Treat!" They asked me what I was dressed as. I told them that I was a kid dressed up as an adult! And for that, they gave me two lollies and some chewy candy! Not bad for a kid trapped in an adult's body!

Happy halloween to all of you!

Random Thought

2004-10-29T13:47:00.000+08:00

If you were called a brainless idiot, would you be suffering from brain freeze?

Fighting Fire With....

2004-10-29T13:26:00.000+08:00

...Construction workers. Yup, very un-stereotypical. It's like answering the question "how many people does it take to change a lightbulb?" (I don't quite see the similarities of the incident and the cliche, but I have this feeling that they are very much similar.) How? Why? Shouldn't it be the job of the "Brave Men of Ladder 49?"

I woke up at 4 a.m. and got hold of my towel for a morning shower. I wasn't quite sure why I woke up that early without bothering to look at the time piece. All I can recall was my brother waking me up, telling me to do so. As I neared the bathroom, I realized that I was shook off my bed for a different reason. There was an emergency.

Throwing my towel on th bedroom floor, I rushed upstairs to see what the problem was. And then, before anyone could answer, I heard firecrackers.... or were they gunshots? So again, I asked what the problem was. Apparently, during the night, an overhead powerline just in front of the house beside us broke, exposing a live wire in the process--a live wire that immediately caught fire.

My father went outside to look into it, as did my brothers and me, and several of our neighbors. It was New Year's Eve in a cold October dawn! The sparks created by two strands of wire touching each other provided a luminosity of a floodlight and a bang comparable to firecrackers (think Judas' belt). I rushed inside to call for emergency, while my brother switched off the main power source in the house. Leaving them on would put our house in more risk if and when the fire reaches the main cable.

I called the fire department and they informed me that it was not in their jurisdiction to put off flames caused by electrical wirings! So, does this mean that there are several kinds of firefighters? Hmmmm..... There's one for big flames, one for those caused by candles, one for putting out the flame of a match stick... etc, but none for a flaming live wire. So they told me to call up the local electricity provider.

For 30 minutes or so, I called them thrice just to follow up on when they could--ASAP--send someone over to fix the problem. If the fire reaches the main cable, which, based on my estimate, would take about 20 minutes, the whole street would be engulfed in flames. My father, realizing that desperate times call for desperate moves, commissioned my brother to get sand, and together, threw sand at the live wire. Great idea, although the flaming wire was way beyond their reach, nor the reach of the sand thrown. They were successful, though, in coming up with a sand rain.

It was a good thing that several construction workers were working on a house two houses away from us. My father asked for their help and they immediately got hold of three long slabs of wood. They managed to separate the two wires whose contact with each other were causing sparks and fire. The other one put off the flame by pressing against one of the slabs with his slab. It was also fortunate that there was an electrician on hand to cover the loose ends with electrical tape.

We were all relieved by this turn of events that each of us slowly went back inside our house. At this point, when everything was already alright, the electricity company's lineman came.

Now that's what I call fast reaction to an emergency situation. What has this country gone to? I really don't understand how one country, capable of coming up with the brightest of ideas, be so lagging in technology. A central company could have immediately directed the call to all relevant departments and dispatched someone close to the scene immediately.

So how do you fight fire the next time you encounter one? Don't call emergency hotline numbers as it will only prove futile. Rely on yourself and probably a handful of neighbors to think instinctively on what to do. Rely on construction workers.

How many construction workers does it take to put off a fire? Three. Just make sure to have my dad these to instruct them what to do.

To Anonymous

2004-10-27T08:19:00.000+08:00

Dear Anonymous,

I noticed that you have been posting comments on my blog for quite some time now. It may be better if you post your email address as well so I could personally thank you for your comments.

I actually ask my friends to view my posts and comment on them but very few actually do. Believe me when I say that I was surprised to see some people other than my close friends post comments on my blog site. And you, Anonymous, are one of the many who have always made my day complete.

It is very inspiring to note that my sentiments and practically my entire life reaches out to people other than those I have close contact with. At least now, I can say that I am already a true celebrity (technically, not yet, but I think I'm getting there).

Anyway, I would like to know you better. Are you, by any chance, related to Mr. Snuffalupagus (did I get the name of your relative correct?)? Coz it sounds the same....

To Jo-em, Emmerdale and the other comment poster, thanks for making my day brighter! But to you, Anonymous, you just seem to add more mystery to my everyday.... I hope to actually meet you one of these days.

Cheers,
City Slicker

It Is Not Me

2004-10-25T15:04:00.000+08:00

I looked at the mirror at the men's room today and I saw a different person. It is not me that I am staring at! (Cue Twilight Zone theme.) It must be stress or fatigue, but it really just didn't happen overnight.

It all started last Friday, when I crammed myself with too many things to do in so little time. Saturday, I took some of my colleagues out for a few drinks and got home at around 4 am. I wasn't able to go to the gym nor play badminton over the weekend. Yesterday, I started acting differently. It was an entirely different me that I dare not acknowledge. But I have no choice because that is the life I am currently living.

Last night, the starkest manifestation of my evolution presented itself to me as a shock. I brought one of my friends to a local massage parlor, the one where you get "extra service." He offered to treat me to a "massage." Alas, I declined! Me?!? Decline such an offer?!? Since when??? Well, since last night. I never imagined it would happen but it did. I was beyond myself last night. I was so tired and stressed out that I didn't even bother if the "massage" was free. I just wanted to go home and get some zzzs.

That alone shouts that I am not myself anymore.

And it didn't stop there. This morning, I woke up rather irated over the fact that my brothers didn't want me to go with them to pick up my parents and my grandmother from the airport. They wanted me to take our little sister to school instead. I figured, the driver could take her to school and I could absent myself from work in the morning. I would rather be there welcoming my parents and salivating over the chocolates they brought home.

And so it was that my entire morning became so affected by my morning rush of ire that I unintentionally wrote a very rude letter to our general manager. Talk about insubordination. The letter asked me when is the most convenient time for us to meet. I replied with a very staunchy, "I think we have to meet some other time...." Good grief! I thought I had to prepare myself to get my last paycheck by tomorrow. I guessed I had to pack my things immediately! It's a good thing that our general manager is so forgiving that she brushed the rudeness aside.

I tell you, right now, I feel funny. I don't feel like me. I need to hit the gym to regain my oldself. I don't even know who I have become!

So if someone asks me now who I am, this would be my reply:

"Who am I? I'm Spiderman."

I Crush You!

2004-10-21T08:48:00.000+08:00

I remember a few years ago, when I picked my kid sister from school, I heard her male classmate say, "Mary Anne, I crush you!"

Believe me, I was fascinated and overwhelmed, not so much by the gesture but by the way the kid composed his sentence. Who could blame him? I mean, crush is love in a lesser degree, right? And you would typically be saying "I love you," so why not say "I crush you?"

Nice going kiddo, but you have to get past three older brothers before you could actually crush my sister into loving you!

Speaking of crushes, I was working out in the gym last night, biding my time before going home. Lo and behold, who do I see? It's my crush from way back in high school. Believe it or not, there is still something in me that says, "Go on, tell her that you like her!"

She is a batch lower. Back in high school, I would always go out of my way just to catch a glimpse of her. I know she takes the train going home as I do, but we were always waiting on opposite tracks. I would stretch my neck like a giraffe just to see her from the other platform. She's not that tall, but she is, for me, one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen in my entire life who is a non-celebrity. She is a Rose McGowan deadringer.

Last night was no different. I just looked at her from afar, thinking how I could start a conversation with her. But as many of you who know me may have guessed, the torpedo in me worked its way out.

If only I could ask her out for a date. If only I could ask her for a small talk over a cup of tea. If only I could muster enough courage and tell her upfront, "I crush you!"

Ship Without a Captain

2004-10-19T19:59:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was our first day to physically have no captian on board. We were steering a ship without our skipper.

Sad to say, last week was officially our former boss' last week with us. She will be coming in occasionally, but it will be different. They will merely be apparitions to us who continue to thrive and live in the real world we call our office. Each time she will be passing by, we will most likely be able to smell flowers or candles or.... hmmm.... I guess it is a different being altogether.

As early as now, we are already feeling the emptiness of being orphaned so suddenly.

Personally, I just think of it as her being away for summer in a camp. Or being away for merely a week, and that next week, she'll be back.

Until the new skipper comes along, I guess we'll just have to learn to steer the ship on our own, with the voice of our captain blowing in the wind into our ears every now and then.

Aloha

2004-10-12T13:16:00.000+08:00

Aloha, in Hawaii, means both hello and goodbye. That's what I learned from watching Miss Congeniality. It even pulls off an aloha joke which goes, "So when you answer the phone, you say 'aloha.' But when you end the conversation, you say 'aloha,' and the conversation starts all over again." Or something to that effect. Ms. Rhode Island definitely found it to be funny.

Anyway, this piece is not about a Hawaiian or about pineapples. It is about hellos and goodbyes.

Just recently, we all got word that our boss resigned from her work to join another company. I still quite remember how she welcomed me to the team not so long ago (it was just, in fact, under a year when I joined her team). I have grown accustomed to the way she does things around the office, her "coaching" style of management, so to say. She is not much of a talker, but she has her funny moments. And to me, and to all of us I suppose, more than a boss, she has become a very good friend.

And now, she is saying aloha to me once again. Not the hello aloha but the goodbye aloha. When I first got wind of her decision to resign, I was devastated. I thought, "Where in the world will I ever find another boss as good and as understanding and as ideal as her?" But hey, who can stop her? She is, after all, transferring to greener pastures. And when I say greener, it is definitely greener, with all the green money she will be earning.

Gone are the days when we would prod her to join us for a late-night badminton game. Gone are the days when we would go down to get some breakfast at McDonald's. Gone are the days when we would go get coffee in a nearby cafe. Gone are the days when I could freely do my blog to relax my mind for a while.

I will definitely miss all those things. I will miss my daily msn chatmate. I will miss saying my daily good mornings and goodbyes. She was, and will forever be, one of the best bosses I've ever had. She will always be my elder sister. She will always be my friend.

So I'm saying aloha to her. Not aloha goodbye, but aloha hello. Because now, despite the fact that she will be leaving the company, she will be coming back not as our boss, but as our friend.

So roll out those coconuts and pineapples. We'll be having a luau!

That's What I Need

2004-10-07T13:02:00.000+08:00

I have heard so many songs in my life and I have related to pretty much a lot of them. That's what makes music so fascinating. It really mirrors the reality of life: the way we feel, think, act, what we experience in our day-to-day living. The following song done by a local artist has been around for a few decades now, and yet its lyrics never seem to cease to haunt me. Maybe because I often feel that way. And I have always been in search of people who will be able to fill the void that I often feel, normally during my suicidal state of mind. Note that the term I used is people. I am not in search of a particular person but several people who will be able to do the things stated in the selection.

A Friend

I've still been searching
And long have I waited
For someone to like me as me
To laugh with, to cry with
To be just beside with
A friend that's who I need

To fight with, make up with
To know that you need them
Believing that they need you, too
To walk hand in hand with
To argue to talk with
A friend that's who I need

And even thoughI make mistakes
And never do anything right
A smile, a hug
Can change all that
And everything will be alright

Someone who'll share all
my dreams and ambitions
Someone who'll love me as me
I need this person
Someone to rely on
A friend that's who I need
A friend that's who I need

*************
Come to think of it, a girlfriend will fit perfectly into that description. However, for a girlfriend, what the song doesn't state (but is very much required in my standards) is that someone who will not burn your credit card down to a crisp, or someone who will not drive you nuts. Does someone fit that description perfectly? I'm not sure if such a being exists. Until then, I will be waiting..... and waiting....

....still waiting.....

Weird Sighting

2004-10-06T10:58:00.000+08:00

The last time I saw squirrels was two years ago, in my aunt's backyard in Long Island. So imagine my surprise when I saw a couple of squirrels doing a High Live Wire Act in my sister's school this morning! I mean, you never see wild squirrels running around in this country, do you? Our driver thought it was a big rat. When I looked harder, I noticed it had a bushy tail, and it had a companion! They must be squirrels! Unless, of course, the local rats have evolved into much graceful and amusing creatures.

Hmmm..... It's really very weird. What will I expect next? Snow in this country? When will that ever happen. Hmmmm..... maybe there is a possibility that we'll be having a white Christmas after all!

Rip Van Winkie

2004-10-06T10:52:00.000+08:00

I've never felt more refreshed my entire life (or for as long as I can remember).

I went home quite early yesterday because of a very bad stomach. Immediately after arriving home, I took a trip to the throne room with much success. I logged on my computer and felt another urge. So I made a trip to Jerusalem once again, and I felt so exhausted after that.

I intended to attend class last night after my first ordeal. After the second one, however, I felt too exhausted. I sprawled on my bed, aiming to just take a nap. My stomach still felt queasy. It was still 5 in the afternoon.

Imagine my surprise when I woke up. It was already 6 in the morning! The stomach ache was gone and I felt extraordinarily refreshed. It's as if I slept for a hundred years!

Well, there goes my school attendance for the night.

Double Whammy

2004-10-04T13:42:00.000+08:00

There are opportunities and there are opportunities. Some rain on you as if it were pouring like a tropical storm. Some just fly by like the wind in a dry summer air.

Last week, I was supposed to go to Singapore to cover an event sponsored by a local PR agency. I had to turn it down because I promised a friend that I'll meet up with her. Incidentally, she lives in Singapore and will be here for four days. I have already set that appointment weeks before news about the trip came about.

Unfortunately, the meeting never materialized. She had to go back to Singapore after only 24 hours because the sister-in-law of her husband died. Too bad I missed the Singapore trip. I might have been able to meet up with her in Singapore had I not passed up on the chance. It was really a very great opportunity to pass up, especially since offers like these pass me by just once in a blue moon. I would have been able to see Sentosa again, and probably the Night Safari.

But, as they say, what goes around comes around. I am sure there will be a next time. The next time may come in the form of me meeting up with her or me being able to return to Singapore. Until that time, I will have to gloat about last week's double whammy.

Plans for The Year Ahead

2004-10-04T13:33:00.000+08:00

It's October. In a few month's time, it will be 2005. I am not really keen on coming up with New Year's Resolutions, especially not this early. But I do have plans. I am not sure if it will all materialize but nevertheless, I came up with them. Just in case I need to do certain reality checks in the future.

Finish my MBA
Take up dancing lessons (ballroom and street)
Take up photography
Get a girlfriend
Have a "to-die-for" body
Get my teeth fixed (straighten them up a little) and whitened (damn tea stains)
Start my own business
Migrate either to the United States or to Australia

I just wish these plans would materialize by next year. I need to do everything on this list before I reach the ripe old age of 30. Yup, I consider it as a ripe old age in my case because I believe that I have already undergone mid-life crisis, making the 30s and 40s my prime years. I'll probably be six feet under beyond that age.

I Am an Eel

2004-10-04T13:27:00.000+08:00

I just realized something. I am an eel.

I am a Piscean. That makes me a fish. I love the water, and I don't like the idea of eating fish. I feel that I am violating my own species.

I was born in the Year of the Snake. This makes me a snake. I do have a tendency to grip people until I strangle them to death. Of course, this statement is just figurative, otheriwse, I would have been in deathrow way before I could even start with this blog series.

I think being an eel makes me more electrifying and energetic. Uhm, well, uh..... Ok, maybe I am not an electric eel after all. Nevertheless, I am still an eel.

Jammin' in the Street

2004-09-30T09:30:00.000+08:00

I clocked in at 7:59:30 this morning. It was like a cliffhanging experience for me, rushing to the 28th floor of our building in the morning, hoping that the computer clock is slower than my wrist watch. And boy, was I relieved to arrive just in the nick of time.

But why the rush? I mean, why the hell was I almost late to begin with?

I woke up relatively early this morning, about 30 minutes earlier than my normal waking time. I changed my routine a bit and had breakfast before I took a shower. Normally, I would do the opposite. I finished about 15 minutes before 7:00 and signalled to my suster, "To the Batmobile!"

You can just imagine the soundtrack that plays in my head during this time. Tandandanan tandandanan Batman! Batman! Hmmmm.... You must be thinking of me in a spandex suit right now. Sorry, but I was in my right mind this morning to wear my underwear first before my pants.

Anyway, we reached the highway and saw a long queue of cars that were at a standstill. This could not be good. Apparently, there was an accident in the highway this morning. A trailer crashed onto something and was practically occupying two of the three-lane highway. After that, it was just a chain reaction of traffic jams throughout the Metro.

When it rains, it pours, so they say. And yup, it did rain this morning. But it did not pour hard. What poured over was my fury over some traffic aides and policemen who stalled traffic further. About 20 minutes away from the office, I had to endure the worst morning traffic I have ever encountered in one of the main thoroughfares of the city where I work in. It would normally take me about 5 minutes to get to the office from where I was stuck awhile ago, but no! These horrible creations belonging to the animal kingdom who disguise themselves as humans in traffic aide and police uniforms are causing much more traffic, contrary to what they were supposed to do, which is direct traffic to help ease its flow. They were not following the traffic lights and, even we had the green light, we were still stalled. The opposite lane is still going, and going, and going, and going.... you get what I mean.

What is the use of those traffic lights anyway if they are only to be overridden by some low-life nincampoops who claim to know more about synchronizing traffic than the tried-and-tested, synchornized, fully functional and very much efficient traffic lights that the government has invested heavily upon? And they are being paid for being such imbeciles! And here's another kicker. There were four of them in an intersection. Only one was directing traffic while the three others were just in one corner, talking and laughing their hearts out. They should be apprehended for delaying the lives of people, which results to delayed transactions, which leads to failed deals, which messes up a company's growth potential, ultimately killing the economy! But who will apprehend them? They can't apprehend themselves.

Well, that is a job for me! Coz' I'm Batman!

Robin, to the Batcave!

Here's something for all you low-lying scumbags of society! Pow! Whack! Kaboom! Pok! Kablam!

Colored Dots

2004-09-29T13:53:00.000+08:00

Here I go again with my Yahoo! games addiction.

After Text Twist, here comes Bounce Out. And boy, am I really addicted to it!

Every chance that I get, I try to play it and outbeat my high score. Unfortunately, the game has tormented me physically and psychologically. My eyesight is worse more than ever. I have to admit, staring at the screen for so long seeing a variety of colors could really strain your eyes a lot.

Psychologically, I can't think of anything else but outdoing myself all the time--just in this game, of course. And did I tell you that the first thing I do in the morning upon waking up is log in at Yahoo! games just to get my morning fix of the colored balls? I also end the day by playing with those damn dots at night. And just like the horrid letters of Text Twist, I now have dreams of colored balls falling all over the place, trading places, etc. It is really a nightmare! A VERY BAD NIGHTMARE!

I should sue Yahoo! for coming up with such addicting games for all the physical and psychological impairment I have developed because of this game! I want to stop this addiction! And I want to stop it now!

Well, I guess that's it. Back to the game!

Random Thought

2004-09-29T11:17:00.000+08:00

What would you do if the person whom you know is the right one for you is with another person whom you know is very wrong for him or her?

Torpedo

2004-09-23T11:11:00.000+08:00

Hello! I am Eldon. And I am a Torpedo.

What exactly is a torpedo?

To many people around the world, it is an ammunition launched as a form of defense, normally from a naval vessel of underwater orientation (think submarine). However, that is not what I am.

To some people in our country, torpedo is someone who wants to express something to a special someone but could not. One who wishes to profess love and admiration, but doesn't have the balls to do so. One who would like to get hitched but is afraid to approach the hitchee. It comes from the local word torpe, which means just what I explained a while ago.

I am Eldon, and I am a torpedo.

For many years, I have tried to approach women. Sometimes, I would be able to muster enough courage to do so. But oftentimes, I fail. I never got the chance to tell a lot of these chicks how I truly feel about them, or how much I wanted them to be a part of my life.

I am Eldon. I don't want to be a torpedo anymore. I want to free myself from the bondage of the Lonely Hearts Club. I want to form part of a team to be able to join in the Amazing Race. I want to be a Colin to a Christie or a Brandon to a Nicole, or a Zach to a Flo. I WANT TO GET INTO A FORMAL RELATIONSHIP! AND I WANT IT NOW!

I am Eldon. Anyone free for drinks tonight? Pick you up at 8.

Eldon's Four Points to Happiness

2004-09-22T13:35:00.000+08:00

Talk less.
Ask not.
There is no such thing as friends. Only acquaintances.
Loneliness is the greatest form of happiness.

Something New

2004-09-22T10:13:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I took on a new name.

I think I should have done this a long time ago. I should have left my old self behind way before my life got too complicated -- not because of environmental factors but because of me.

But all that is over now. I believe that I should move on with my life and start anew. And I am starting that new life with a new name.

Call me Eldon.

Suicide Diaries

2004-09-17T14:15:00.000+08:00

Today, I want to die. Just today, right at this moment. Don't ask me why, I just want to. Here are a few ways I am currently pondering on to fulfill my terminal task:

Jump off our office building from the rooftop.
Eat expired Oreos found here in my trash can.
Go to the toilet and slash my wrist with a cutter.
Better yet, slash my neck (the jugular vein is better to slash).
Wash my hands and touch an electrical socket.
Drink rat poison so I'll bleed to death.
Bang my head endlessly on my monitor. I just wish I won't survive this one. Otherwise I will be fired for destroying company property.
Strangling myself to death with the wire of my headphones.
Hire an assassin.
Just stand in the middle of the street until a rampaging truck or motorcycle or cab hits me.

Take me with you! Let me see the light at the end of the tunnel. NOW!

Romancing the Dryer

2004-09-15T15:45:00.000+08:00

What a great way to work up the day!

Somebody gave me some fudge brownies at 10:00 a.m. I had two servings, in fact. I placed them in a tissue paper to avoid spoiling my office uniform and my fingers.

Twilight zone kicked in when one of the brownies fell on my shirt, tumbling all the way down to my pants! I have multiple stains all over my entire uniform. Hmmmm..... Think of me as a kid who just ate tons of chocolate cookies with chocolate stains all over the face. The only difference is that my stains had a wider coverage. I should sue the brownie for multiple homicide!

Frantic to rid my light-colored pants off the stains, I thought of going to the wash room and wipe it off with a tissue paper. It was really disgusting! It's as if my genitalia just had a bout with diarrhea! Talk about exiting the wrong hole!

So I did, with a little tissue and some soap. I tried so hard to eliminate the stains. Unfortunately, it left my pants all worked up with water stains. Now, I didn't look like someone who just had penile diarrhea, but one who doesn't have control of his bladder! I thought, "I couldn't go out and tell everybody how cool it is to pee in my pants!" What to do?

Think Mr. Bean! I was left with no other option but to romance the dryer! Yup, that is what romancing the dryer is all about. Putting your lower body under the dryer, moving in a front and back motion (or semi-up and down motion) to make sure that all the water stains are dried off. It was a good thing no one saw me in the wash room. I would have been mortified, errr I should say, that person might be mortified! He would simply think that I was desperate, so desperate that I simply gave in to lust and contented myself with just a dryer.

Hmmm.... I am just wondering what household appliance to romance next time.

I Need A Makeover

2004-09-13T13:08:00.000+08:00

I guess it is just one of those days again. Right now, I think I need a makeover. Not just a physical makeover but a generalized makeover. Have you ever watched that fab five show Queer Eye for the Straight Guy? Sometimes, I wish I was the guy they are going to give tips to. Have you seen those reality shows, or even Oprah, where they give the person a facelift, a nose job, or any kind of plastic surgery to make the person more physically appealing? Well, I wish I had that opportunity as well.

What do I want to change physically? Hmmm.... Well, for one, I want to change my nose. I want it to be more sharp, finer. I want my cheeks deeper. And yes, I want to have deep set eyes as well. I would like to have a lower hairline and I would like more facial hair, thank you!

If all these were taken together, I would probably have a plastic surgery of my entire face. I would probably have the face of Tom Cruise replicated. Or my best friend. Or my next best friend. Probably, I would be able to attract more women, especially the dominatrix type. Hehehehehe....

Anyway, I would also like to have a liposuction. I would like to get rid of these love handles, my problem spot. And don't forget about those cellulites in my thighs. *sigh* I would also liked to be buffed up, but not too much.

In another aspect, I would like to change the way I view things. I would like to have more confidence in myself. I would like to be more sensitive to the needs of women. I would like to be able to talk to women in such a way that I don't sound like the very friendly type of person whom every chick considers just a friend and nothing more.

I would also like to be intelligent, someone who knows things just like that. I would like to be analytical, yet creative at the same time. I would like to be able to make use of the talents I have to help others and also, make money on the side.

Hmmmm..... Pathetic, isn't it? I'm green with envy, it seems.... envious of the people I know, envious of the way they live their lives, envious of the way they see life and people and the universe in general. Right now, I am in a vacuum. I feel so unconfident, so low.

But hey, this is just one of those days. Tomorrow may be different. I may not be as frustrated with me as I am now. Thank God for tomorrows.

Reminiscing friendships

2004-09-09T15:24:00.002+08:00

Suddenly, I miss my friends. I guess this is just one of those days....

My Father's House - February 2004
(My pre-birthday party)

Kay Inay - 2001
(My birthday party)

Enchanted Kingdom - December 21, 2003

[Jonathan's Birthday Party (hehehehehe)]

My Sassy Girl

2004-09-07T16:32:00.000+08:00

After watching My Sassy Girl for the second time last night, and finally seeing the end of the movie, I just realized several things.

Realization # 1.

Koreans have a very unique way of telling a story. And it is really truly extraordinary how this story unravelled before us. Not twisty, but catchy. Although there were some lull moments in the movie, which allowed me to doze off a couple of times, I found the overall concept very romantic and funny.

Realization # 2.

Looks are not everything. So they say. And it is also what this movie reiterates. The male lead looked like shit, no charisma whatsoever, and his face is just as funny as hell! Heck, I MIGHT (operative word is might) even look better than him in some primitive society's standards. And yet, he was able to bag this really hot chick (hot, by my standards). I think that one day, I will be able to get myself a chick as hot as the female lead. No, she is not that stunning, but she is someone you will fall over for over and over again.

Realization # 3.

While watching the movie, I noticed that I kind of like the idea of being bossed around by a girl. I like the idea of being the underdog type, of someone lording over my life, yet at the same time, giving me direction. I just realized that the reason why I haven't been in a formal relationship since birth is because I haven't found someone to push me around enough for me to like her the least. You see, I now realize that I prefer the dominatrix type of women (dream sequence: leather tights and whip.... whappack!).

Now, if only I can come up with a perfect match of all the descriptions of the ideal woman I like before I reach the ripe old age of 30, what a wonderful world it would be for me. I just wish that time will be cooperative enough to grant me this wish soon...

Hallers and Kareks: An Evolution Story

2004-09-01T22:52:00.000+08:00

Language has evolved quite significantly throughout time. Words were mixed and matched to come up with new words that have an entirely new meaning. If people from the past were time warped to the present, they would probably think that the present is an alien world where the universal creatures have assumed the form of human beings and started a new race of beings here on earth. Get it?

Such was my fascination about certain words I heard over and over again the whole day. I have heard them somewhere before, from officemates, I guess, but I never realized how rampant their use was.

Word 1: Haller

I heard some officemates talking with each other when suddenly, someone blurted out, "Haller!" And then, in my favorite tea place, I heard someone mention the damn word again. And now, as I am doing this stuff, I hear yet another person in a local TV program blurt out the exact same word!

Quite obviously, haller is another word for hello. Hello, as we all know, is a form of greeting used widely in answering the phone, or starting a conversation with someone you just met. The word then got used to start phrases like, "not me!" as in "Hello! Not me!" The word then got used to mean, "Are you sure?" or "Come on" or.... you get what I mean. And then, it evolved to hallo, thanks to some flirtatious females trapped in men's bodies down at the store in the corner of the street. From hallo, it became halloo, and now--haller! Fancy evolution, I suppose.

Word 2: Karek

I heard this one from my immediate boss (or should I say read). Now this word, this word is still in its initial stage of evolution. Of course, it is a "new" word for correct. The word, locally, is pronounced by the brutes and the brusque as korek, and pronounced the same way (remember, it doesn't have a "t"). And now, as we know it, the word has been altered yet again to be pronounced as "karek." I will not be surprised if the word will eventually evolve into "karatch," "kurash," "karakas," and so on.

These words may eventually become part of local lingo, evolve into something else, or probably die a slow death. Many such words created in the 80s have reached a stage of extinction. Whatever it is, the fanciful words that come up in our day-to-day conversations reflect how colorful the local culture is and how creative the people are.

I am glad I belong to such culture. I am prestiged to belong to such a fanciful race.

Until the next blog. Adieulehihu!

Eruptions

2004-08-31T09:03:00.000+08:00

It is the last day of the month. Typically, for me, this day would be uneventful..... so uneventful!

However, I woke up this morning and discovered a few things that would make my day a living hell!

As I was rubbing my eyes to wakeful bliss, I felt a sudden pain right at the corner of my left eye. Yup, it is a sty--the pimply thing that appears on our - you guessed it - eyes! And boy, does it hurt. Local folklore has it that you can get a sty through peeping. Trust me, the last time I peeped was... oh well.... yesterday? If you would consider that peeping! I was merely marveling at how some ladies passing by the street wore T-back and some wore regular panties, and how some were bunched up in the.... well, you know what I mean. Technically, it is not peeping. But that is just how far it goes. Now I wonder, where did I get this wretched sty of mine? Now I couldn't wear contact lenses, which have a uniform grade of +325. I have to walk in a blur wearing my glasses, whose lenses are graded at +275. Oh, and by the way, my eyes are +400. You could just imagine the haziness I am in today. All because of this damn sty.

So I went to the bathroom to do my morning rituals. To my horror, I saw another volcanic threat ready to erupt. In fact, I saw two of them, and yes, they are painful as well! Two pimples-- one on my right cheek, and the other on the corner of my nose! Talk about teenage woes! The thing is, I am way past my teenage years! In fact, I am about 8 years past my teenage years! Damn!

I just wish that things will look brighter from hereon. I don't know if I can take another eruption, wherever it may be. This is too much for someone who doesn't get eruptions often.

So, does anybody here have tea tree oil?

Letters and Dreams

2004-08-23T17:15:00.000+08:00

I had a very tiring weekend, so to say.

I had three hours of badminton game last Friday, one hour last Saturday and two hours yesterday. Amidst all the energy lost in these games, I also lost some sleep time over the weekend. I slept at 2 am on Friday, 4 am on Saturday, and 2 am yesterday.

This is probably the reason why I feel so drained today. Top it off with a helping of parental sermons and you have a perfect mix of life-fatigue syndrome. Midlife crisis? Probably -- if I would consider 54 as my dying age.

Back to feeling drained. As soon as I took my place in front of my computer this morning, I couldn't feel anything but sheer sleepiness. My eyes were droopy and my body was limp. I was practically lifeless.

So I had some editing jobs to do. It is a good thing that proofreading and editing now entails the use of a computer. Otherwise, if it were done on paper, I would have practically struck out all the lines with my pen (which used to happen to me by the way).

While editing, I would find myself in another dimension - the dimension of La la land. It has never happened so often in a day until today. Everytime I try to fight it off, I immediately get lured back to dream state. Yup, dream state. I was actually having dreams during those mini dozes. The funny thing is, all dreams were the same!

Everytime I'd fall off to sleep, I would dream of random letters -- six letters to be exact -- and in my dream I would rearrange them to come up with a word, or words, that are valid. Believe me, this is punishment enough for obsessing too much on Yahoo! Games' Text Twist! I swear, had I not been rearranging these letters in my dream, I would have probably been chased by them.

I used to find it funny how TV depicts people being chased by numbers after a hard day's work in an accounting firm. I really couldn't believe how people could actually see themselves being chased by huge, human-sized numbers. Until today, when I myself am living proof that numbers -- and letters, for that matter -- are as lifesize in La la land as you can imagine.

Y A E M R D ===> D R E A M Y

Kill Phil vol. 2

2004-08-17T10:08:00.000+08:00

There are several ways to skin a cat, so goes a cliche. There are also several ways to kill Phil. So, who really is Phil?

Remember the roach who shared the shower with me? Well, let's just say that she has a friend whom I shall name Phil. This morning, as I was gloriously sitting in my throne room (remember my throne room from hell?), I saw him, prancing his way around the chamber, not fearing what would happen to his dear life.

I am not scared of roaches, nor do I find them icky. I just hate them when they crawl on my skin. Fortunately this morning, nothing of that sort happened. In the event, however, that Phil charged at me, I was prepared for battle!

If there is one thing I have mastered in my many years of existence, it is the art of killing roaches. So how exactly do you kill Phil? Here are some proposed ways:

Traditional ways:

Crush him with a slipper.
Swat him with a rolled newspaper.
Step on him
Spray mega doses of insectide on him until he falters and goes into a coma and then death.

Non-traditional ways:

Pour mega doses of alcohol on the wretched beast.
Dump toothpaste on him. This will immobilize him to death.
Pour shampoo (the thicker and creamier, the better) on the imp. This will immobilize him and will immobilize his wings (yes, roaches do fly).
Lure him in the toilet water and flush him all the way down.
Pour huge amounts of water on him until he flips over and can't stand up. He will die in this position if unmoved for several days.
Pour hot water on him.

I have tried all these methods and all of them work. Fortunately for me, and for Phil, he didn't charge at me. He danced a little more around my throne room until he quietly slipped off in a small crack near the sink.

Kill Phil plan aborted. For now....

Scratches and Dents

2004-08-16T12:54:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, at around 11:50 p.m., on the way to a local cinema to catch The Village, I met an unusual accident.

Flashback several hours before the incident.

I came from a party of a high school friend, which was about an hour's drive away from the city. The area is very remote considering that I am used to traveling only within city limits. After spending some time watching a Korean movie, My Sassy Girl, which gave all of us a headache, we decided that it was time to leave.

On the way to the movie house, I had to pick up my brother, who was out with his girlfriend the entire day but had no idea how to get back home. I should have given him some bread so he could leave bread crumbs on the road. Unfortunately, I got too caught up in traffic that I decided to turn around and proceed to the cinemas instead, telling him to just sleep over at our cousin's house.

From the traffic, I careened all the way to the heart of the city, traveling at an unusual speed of 100 to 120 kilometers per hour under torrential rains. Slippery when wet, indeed. A few blocks away from the cinema, I decided to slow down, since I had enough time to park and buy the ticket for the movie. Surprise, surprise! Another vehicle hit me on the side!

As I was cruising at a speed of 20 kilometers per hour (talk about cruise control), a vehicle emerged from a hotel parking lot and positioned itself on the center lane. As I was going to turn right, I was on the right-most lane, logically. As I was about to turn right, this vehicle turned right as well, hitting me on the door of the driver's seat. Apparently, the guy driving didn't notice I was there. We spent about an hour waiting for the traffic management bureau personnel to arrive. But we waited in vain. So we went to the station instead to file a police report.

Blessing of blessings, I just renewed my license, which had been expired for five whole months without my conscious knowledge, just last Tuesday. Imagine, I was driving for five months without a valid license, and nothing happened. It was a good thing that the one who hit me was good, and he was man enough to admit his fault. And the police officer who took charge of our case was kind enough to process the papers despite the fact that I was missing the cars registration.

A comic relief for the night. While narrating to the police officer his side of the story, me and my companions overheard him say how he "sidesweeped" my car. And my companion, being the feisty girl that she is, proudly corrected him, saying that we were not "sideswiped" but rather rammed on the side.

I didn't get to see The Village. However, I am still thankful that no one was hurt during the incident. God is REALLY VERY GOOD! And I have the scratches and the dents in my car to prove just that!

Reminiscing Poetry

2004-08-12T08:52:00.000+08:00

I was going through my geocities site this morning when I chanced upon several poems that I did back in University. No, they were not part of our curriculum, they were just part of me. It was my hobby, and still is, whenever I do get the time. I just love playing with words and letting my imagination run wild. Among my favorites is the poem The Art of Love Baking. Here it is:

The Art of Love Baking

First, pre-heat the oven
While the dough is new
Squeezing and squeezing
All the way through

Just a little
Then in excess
A mouthful of clear chock'lit
Fill it up with French "Kisses"

Then lay it flat
Working downwards on
Gently moistening
With the spatula's tongue

Then, while the oven is hot
Slowly push it in
Then rest and pause
Then seal it in

Poke it once, twice
Many times to be exact
Feels hotter and hotter
And intense, that's a fact

Then…..SPLAT!
The gooey white filling goes
Voila…
That's how love baking goes.

The Throne Room From Hell

2004-08-10T14:55:00.000+08:00

Have you heard about the throne room from hell? Well, I've just been there and will probably be there tonight. Do you want to know how I got there? Well, read on and find out.

Yesterday, I had a total of about 9 cups of tea, different flavors, the entire day. I ate sausages in the morning, potato chips in the afternoon, and a pack of KFC Hot Shots in the evening. For those of you who don't know KFC Hot Shots, those are little chicken pieces that are spicy hot in flavor -- and I mean HOT, HOT, HOT! I had 2 oranges as well before going to bed.

This morning, I woke up with the achiest of all my stomach aches, I needed to rush to the "throne room" half awake. Lo and behold, I was suffering from diarrhea. I don't know why. It must be the tea, or the lack of solid in my digestive system. Whatever it was, I was really shitting like hell!

I went to the throne room a total of four times this morning. By my fourth trip, I was totally exhausted. My a-hole felt so sore because of all the spastic movement. Good grief!

So everybody has diarrhea every now and then. What makes this throne room experience a hell-like experience, you may ask. Remember the Hot Shots thing I told you about? Have you ever eaten something very hot that when you excrete it rectally, you feel a burning sting in your a-hole? Well, I had that this morning. Couple that with the pain brought about by the diarrhea spasms in my rectum, I felt that I had just survived a very hellish experience.

This sure beats the aftermath of taking Xenical!

A Duffy Story

2004-08-10T09:26:00.000+08:00

Some time ago, I watched A Cinderella Story with some office friends, my brother and his girl, and my cousins. Of course, it is a cheesy movie, but hey, it's free! Beggars can't be choosers, you know!

The plot was very much like the classic Cinderella story, but with a modern touch. But I should tell you, this movie is just that - a movie. It is not like real life, which a movie should mirror. There were a lot of flaws in the story, and these flaws are just plain unbelievable.

Take the fact that Samantha, the lead character, was only wearing a mask at the ball. And not a face mask, but the kind of mask that only covers the area surrounding your eyes, just above the nose. And the stupid jock doesn't even recognize her??? Come on, give me a break! And this same stupid guy who fails to recognize people, gets into Princeton! Now I should say from this movie that the educational system of America is very flawed indeed! And the voice of the "mystery" girl gives her away easily. So why doesn't this all-American jock still recognize her whenever they get to talk to each other? I mean, who has that kind of voice but Lizzie Maguire?

And then, there is the cell phone. She leaves her cell phone behind at the dance and she doesn't even try to look for it? Come on! Didn't she notice it was missing? Forward to the next scenes where she doesn't even talk about her missing phone. Now, how moronic can this film get?

Oh, and aside from the storyline, guess what - or who - else is flawed? Hillary Duff. Well, I guess you could now name her Hillary Puff. Yep, she's too chubby to be "Cinderella," especially in that gown she wore during the ball. It is really far from the image of Cinderella that have been imprinted in our memories. And the way she talks, it is just so Lizzie. It's like watching The Lizzie Maguire Movie once again. Lucky for her, she has her mom to be one of the producers of the film.

An upside to this film, however, is her stepmom, played by the actress who played Stiffler's mom in American Pie, and the Bend-and-Snap girl in Legally Blonde. She was really great when she was driving a speeding car after she got botox injections. And the way she said Norweigian Salmon comes from Norweigia? Classic.

This film is not really for the critics, but for the young teeny bopper girls who like to see a feel good movie, or for the Duffers out there. I liked it for its feel-good character, but other than that, the storyline is completely moronic. You would be better off reading the classic story from your fairy tale collection. Who knows, you might find your ancestor's Last Will and Testament hidden there.

Just Tea

2004-08-09T13:19:00.000+08:00

I love tea.

I used to be a coffee drinker, but now, I am a tea convert. Why you may ask? Well, tea has far less caffeine than coffee. Tea is healthier than coffee. Tea is less fattening than all the condiments you have to put on coffee to make it more delicious. Besides, tea is cheaper in Starbucks or Seattle's Best. And, you could have it refilled with hot water, in case you finish your drink and you still feel the need to drink some more.

Of the numerous tea flavors there are in the world, I had the privilege of being able taste a number of them. Here are a few:

Wild Sweet Orange
My Starbucks favorite. It has the sour-sweet flavor of orange that satisfies my taste buds down to its roots. Very flavorful until you get to the next hot water fill. I think it is also good for the immune system, considering that it is made from oranges, which have vitamin C. Best with two sachets of honey.

Ginger Peach
My Seattle's Best favorite. The ginger in it gives it a mild zing. Plus, they say that ginger is nice for your voice. And peaches... mmm... mmm... mmmm! This is also best taken with two sachets of honey.

Jasmine Green Tea
Green tea never tasted so good with the scent and flavor of Jasmine flowers. The thing about Jasmine tea is that it has a very acrid after taste that smells like rotten flowers. Or is it just my mouth?

Chamomile Tea
A very good substitute for Jasmine tea. Tastes and smells pretty much like chamomile. I find this drink soothing. It gives me inner peace (huh?).

Orange Spice Tea
The flavor of orange with a mild twist! It does have a spicy flavor. It is not as sweet as wild sweet orange, but hey, it tastes just as good. No, it doesn't have pepper and onions and other cooking spices. It just has a touch of spice in it that makes its flavor distinct.

Green Tea
Now this is the healthiest kid in the block! Tastes like grass, hell yes. But who cares? As long as you're healthy, right?

I have tasted other tea concoctions, but so far, these are my favorites. The thing about having tasted various tea flavors is that you don't get to have a tea fatigue syndrome because your taste buds are exposed to different flavors each time you take a sip of that sumptuous cup of tea.

So who said that only the English and Chinese drink tea? I enjoy it as well as they do. Oh, wait a minute, I am part Chinese. I guess that is where my tea fascination comes from.

Tea time!

He Goes By The Name of Oreo

2004-08-09T13:00:00.000+08:00

Oreo - a chocolate sandwich cookie with rich cream filling. Twist open, lick the cream filling and dunk in milk for best results.

I had always been fond of Oreos. I really like it's cream filling which I lick with gusto everytime I eat one. Kind of reminds me of something.... Now don't turn dirty on me, it's not what you think! It reminds me of licking ice cream without the cold feeling.

Apparently, one of my cousins goes by the name of Oreo. He is not just a cousin, but probably one of my best friends as well. Whenever we're together, we just get to enjoy each other's company, and boy, do we really get wild!

I remember visiting him in Australia before and it was really very memorable for me. The sights, the people, but most especially, the "experiences" (if you know what I mean, *wink, wink*). I remember going around the city with him and being left by the bus. No train was available at that time due to some repairs. We had to take a cab to where we left his car, which is a suburb outside Sydney. Aaahhhh... the memories of Sydney. One day, I'll go back there and enjoy the Great Outback to its fullest!

We lost contact for quite some time. I suppose he became very busy as was I. Until this morning, when I received a notification of him accepting my invitation to be part of my multiply network. I never really knew what it was that closed down our lines of communication. I get to email him every now and then, but he doesn't seem to get to reply to them. I don't see him online in msn, nor do I receive any SMS from him.

Despite the lack of communication, I still consider him one of my best buds, one who gave me an unforgettable time in Sydney. Maybe, just maybe, one of these days, he would be able to reply to my messages. Last time I heard, he was doing good with his girl. Hopefully, the next time we meet, I'll have a girl to tag along with me.

Unfortunately, for now, all I can do is be contented with the Oreos in the local grocery and lick all the fillings off it one by one. Someday, I may have a girl to lick Oreo fillings with - not here, but in Sydney.

Food

2004-08-09T12:45:00.000+08:00

Last weekend, I did nothing but binge on glorious food!

Saturday started with a hefty serving of mushroom in scrambled eggs and tuna. The tuna was really tasteful as it had mushrooms and garlic with it. It was so delicious, I needed to have at least a third helping.

Lunch was okay, I guess, with beef in tomato sauce being the main course. And then dinner - a sumptuous serving of penne in pesto sauce! It really worked up my appetite for the whole day. Unfortunately, it had carbohydrates written all over it, which of course, I totally neglected.

In between lunch and dinner, I had two helpings of ice monster! Two helpings! Can you imagine that? One cookies and cream and one mango teaser. It was really all too much for one person who is supposed to be on a diet.

My next sumptuous meal came the next day in the form of fried cold cuts. Of course, they weren't cold anymore because they were fried. What is it with our country that tells us to fry cold cuts when they were actually meant to be served cold? These processed meats have already been pre-cooked and is hence ready to eat. The idiosyncracies of our culture, really.

For lunch, my whole family went to a local Japanese fast food where they serve really great meals! I had tonkatsu, tempura and misono, with a helping of potato balls on the side. That's calories after spoonful of calories, mind you. After that meal, I felt like I couldn't eat another bite for the next week or so.

Lo and behold! Dinner came and I had more food to eat! We went to a children's party where they served barbecue, spaghetti (in two sauces), roasted pig, beef stew, pot pie, fried chicken and truckloads of desserts! Of course, I wouldn't pass on a chance to try everything, so I got a helping of each of the party's dishes.

Now, as far as I can remember, I was on a diet and I took an oath of food celibacy since September. But apparently, I suffered from short-term memory loss over the weekend and forgot all the reasons why I wanted to lose weight to begin with. I do suffer from guilt feelings but hey, food like that passes you once in a blue moon, so why not take the opportunity to indulge?

Now, where did I place my stash of M&Ms?

Fun Day At The Shoot

2004-08-04T09:00:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, at about noon time, I had a photo shoot for a medical publication. Get this, I needed to pose as an epileptic having a seizure. Boy, was it very tiring. I never could imagine myself having those fits. It must really be very difficult for the epileptics to have their seizures.

A few minutes prior to the shoot, me and my friend, who happened to join me in the shoot eventually, played around the studio and had some fun shots taken. Unfortunately, the shots weren't that good. Too bright, or I was not propped up correctly. Too bad, it was really a great opportunity to have a serious studio shot.

We really had a lot of laughs, especially when I was ready to have a seizure. Hahaha, talk about being ready! They said they really pitied me, that I looked really authentic (notice how I could get exaggerated here, you should have seen me yesterday). But they were laughing their asses out. The irony of it.

I really enjoy doing these absurd shoots. I remember having done one for constipation, another for neuropathic pain, another for colds. And to think I am aspiring for a modeling job on TV. Hahahaha. This is far better! I get to do things that other people wouldn't dare to. Artiste par excellence!

Well, until the next shoot.

Do All Dogs Go To Heaven?

2004-07-30T10:39:00.000+08:00

They say that all dogs go to heaven. I hope Bulldog is there right now, praying for me and my family's safety. I hope he is there so I could call on someone to guide me in trying times. I hope....

But there are still some things that puzzle me about that saying. Silly questions, but they continuously bug me.

Do all dogs really go to heaven? How about dogs who have murdered kids? Dogs who bit people? Dogs who savagely kill other dogs?

If all dogs go to heaven, do all cats go to hell? It's like they forever fight, right? And good and evil do fight, right? So if heaven is good, and hell is bad, and all dogs go to heaven... then all cats must go to hell???

If, granted, cats go to heaven as well. And granted that all the animals go to heaven too. How then does heaven look like? Would it look very much like the earth? Does it have plants as well?

I really don't know when I will be able to find the answers to these mind bogglers of mine. One thing is for sure, if there is a heaven, I would sure like to spend eternity there -- with all dogs.

A Bulldog Story (Hours Before Death)

2004-07-30T10:14:00.000+08:00

Tuesday. 9:30 p.m. I opened our housegate to let myself in. I was welcomed amidst loud barks by our two dogs, Whitey (who happens to be a beige mongrel-japanese spitz mix) and Bulldog (who happens to be a mongrel). Don't ask me how they got their names or who gave it to them. I named them other names, but it seems that our house help's monickers stuck to the dogs' brains. Hence, they wouldn't respond to other names but those.

10:15 p.m. My father arrived. My brother opened the gate to let my father in. I then heard him call me to go outside and see Bulldog. Apparently, he couldn't lift his lower body and all he could do was twist and turn using his front legs. He didn't meet an accident with a vehicle again, did he? Apparently not. And then he was urinating all around -- and boy, that's one heck of a urine load. It was like he excreted all of the fluids in his body. What were we to do? We don't know any vet that was open at that time of night. He was definitely dying. First time I see dog death before my very eyes.

Wednesday. 2:30 a.m. Our driver couldn't sleep because he was hearing strange things in the garage. When he went out to see what it was, it was Bulldog, banging his head on our van. Apparently, he was able to find a way to get fro one place to another using his front legs. For some strange reason, I really don't know why. Insanity before death? Well, I didn't actually witness this. Just second hand information. But then again, what could have led to these events? Only God knows.

6:45 a.m. I saw Bulldog sprawled on the garage floor. This is not the same garage, mind you. It is separated by two flights of stairs and a wide veranda. It still baffles me how he could have travelled considering his situation. Anyway, he was not moving, his eyes were directed towards the heavens, and he was breathing heavily. He was definitely dying. Even seeing the vet would prove futile. So we just let him cherish his tragedy on his own sweet time.

5:00 p.m. I got news that Bulldog died. I felt sad, coz I was always the last one to arrive home. These two dogs would always welcome me with their barks and their wagging tails, jump and reach for my hand all the time. They were intelligent dogs who knew how to use the door's banger (those round things you use to knock -- or bang -- depending on how you actually use it). They were silly ones who would crawl on dry soil after a cold bath. They always growled at each other whenever I'm around them both, as if both were struggling for my attention. It just wouldn't be the same without one of them. I used to talk with Bulldog, scolding him every night for not following my instructions. I used to tell him what he should not do to prevent catching some dog diseases. But you really can't teach old dogs new tricks, it seems. Or human's can't really talk to dogs no matter how much they try to. He had a skin disorder he got from a neighbor's dog. And I got real mad at him for acquiring that. Now, I have no dog to talk to but Whitey. I guess Whitey will just do for the mean time. It just won't be the same without the both of them.

Bulldog
2002-2004
Loving pet, mischievous dog, extraordinary member of our family.

Ironic

2004-07-27T15:04:00.000+08:00

An old man turned 98
He won the lottery
And died the next day

It's a black fly
In your chardonay
It's a death row pardon
Two minutes too late

Isn't it ironic?

Well, that is Alanis Morisette for all of you. Life is just so ironic. For the past few weeks, it's been raining like hell here in the city where I work. Day in, I arrive the office with the sun shining brightly. Come afternoons, I leave the office prepared to be drenched in cool summer rain.

Because I leave the house sunny, I dare not bring a jacket or a raincoat or an umbrella. It is just too bulky. Besides, who would ever think it would rain with that kind of bright weather?

But I've learned my lesson well. I dare not sing in the rain once again. Every night, when I get home, I always feel sick to the bone. I have morning sneezing episodes because of this. But today, it's different. I swore I would bring something even if the sun shines very brightly. I believed that no matter how sunny it is in the mornings, the afternoons normally bring in strong rains. Hence, I have with me an umbrella and a jacket.

Now here's the irony. It's about time to go home. With my umbrella and jacket in tow, I can't see a cloud in sight! The sun is shining as brightly as ever. And to think this is the only day I brought my protections along.

Of all the days God chose not to rain, he chose this day. This particular day when I am most prepared. Why?

Because life will forever be an irony.

Creepy Crawlers; Freaky Tuesdays

2004-07-27T09:30:00.000+08:00

What a way to start the day.

I woke up relatively early to go to work.

I was in the shower, rinsing shampoo off my hair when I felt a numbing sensation on my left foot. It's the kind of sensation you feel when your leg has been inactive for so long. You feel as if ants were crawling on your leg. Yup, this had the same sensation.

So I shrugged it off, until I felt the sensation move. What could that possibly be? I couldn't see it as my entire face was covered by shampoo suds.

Feeling the tingling sensation move across the circumference of my lower leg forced me to give off a jerking action (not that jerking action, perv!).

After immediately wiping off the shampoo from my face with a dry towel, I was amazed, aghast, taken aback, I'm running out of words here.... to see, to my horror of horrors.... a cockroach! (Cue in Psycho theme.)

I'm not scared of cockroaches, that I can assure you. I can even hold them with my bare hands (yeah, I can hear you cringe in disgust right now), that is, granted they are not moving anymore. I just don't like the feel of their legs on my skin. It's just so... icky!

I don't know what it was that gave the cockroach enough courage to share a shower with me. I must have some kind of oozing sex appeal that only four-legged creatures appreciate. Or she (I am assuming that the cockroach is female because she was with me in the shower) must be a reincarnation of someone I used to share a shower with in my past life (if I had one).

Good thing my instincts didn't tell me to step on her at first sight. I would have done so in my wide-awake state of mind. Otherwise, I would be scrubbing my feet a thousand times more today. And I would have a bathroom floor with Mentos (crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside) remnants to clean for the next few minutes or so.

Now isn't that some peculiar way to start the day?

The Bystander

2004-07-27T08:43:00.000+08:00

I wasn't really a bystander then. I just happened to be walking towards the scene of where everything happened that day.

Friday afternoon. Everyone was rushing to go home or go elsewhere to enjoy a great weekend start. Rain just stopped pouring and the streets of the city were wet. As for me, I couldn't wait to leave the office and indulge myself in a badminton game a few cities away from where I work.

Me and a new officemate shared the elevator and enjoyed our leisurely walk-and-talk to where we were supposed to take our respective rides. As we were about to cross the street, we saw a group of people gathered right in the middle of one of the most populated avenues in the city. There must be something really wrong there, we thought.

Despite the throng of people gathered there, vehicular traffic continued, however, at a slower pace. Hence, we couldn't just cross the street and go to where all the "action" is because we might get run over by a slow-moving bus, whose driver happens to be looking at the "action" as well.

So me and my officemate became mere bystanders. Standing at the sidewalk to catch all the "action."

But the "action," we realized, was really an "in-action." Right in the middle of the street, there was a lady sprawled on the floor, blood oozing from her head. People were gathered around her, frozen in shock, doing nothing. Yup, the lady's body was not in "action" as she was very still. She was not moving, not one bit. And the people around her were not in "action" as well as they didn't move a muscle and were just content with being spectators.

And then I saw this policeman, who, instead of helping her out immediately, lifted the lady's arm, nudged her leg a little with his foot and went around her still body. It took a few minutes before a vehicle stopped by and some people from the crowd actually took heed of the situation and lifted her into the vehicle.

Once in the vehicle, no one wanted to accompany her to the nearest hospital, which was just a few blocks away from the scene. Fortunately, a traffic aide went with her albeit being prodded by the policeman forcefully.

You see, what happened was she got sideswiped by a raging motorcycle. The vehicles were actually stopped by a traffic enforcer to make way for the pedestrians. But being in a country where traffic enforcement is not given due accord, the good and mighty motorcycle driver went his way and proceeded despite the policeman's order. That was when Harry (the motorcycle) met Sally (the lady).

I myself am guilty of being motionless that afternoon. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't move a muscle. I was in shock. I was frozen as ice. I was mumbling some things I couldn't remember but that was it. It has always been my reaction to an emergency. I never got over it.

The only thing I could do that time, and a few hours after that, was to pray. I couldn't do anything. I just prayed... prayed for her safety... that she survives the ordeal.

So the next time one of you, my dear friends, intend to meet an accident, please don't take me with you. Otherwise, you will just have another bystander looking over your helpless body sprawled in the busy streets of the city.

A Monster's Tale

2004-07-20T13:17:00.000+08:00

A hot day, it is, with the temperature and humidity both rising by the minute. It sure is a nice way to cool off in far away Baguio or in the cool waters of a swimming pool. But I've just been to Baguio and there is no pool in sight... What to do?

Fortunately, there is an Ice Monster outlet in a nearby building... Tempting, I should say. But heck, I can't eat much because of my slow metabolism.

Damn those metabolic rates!

But wait a minute, hot coffee (kapeng mainit)! They do have fruit flavors and toppings to choose from! Hmmm.... I might as well try the mango toppings, 'coz I'm a real sucker for mangoes. But the mandarin oranges look just as tempting... And oranges make my bowel move faster. OK I'll just have the mangoes. But the cookies and cream look more tempting than those two. Decisions... decisions....

I'm going to the gym later, so I guess it's ok to pack in more calories. But I've already had my share of cornicks and choco flakes from Baguio today. So that's like packing in about a million calories, versus the few hundred calories I'll be burning tonight. That would far exceed my daily caloric intake allowance!

Oh, well. Damn indecisions and cursed pride. I guess I'll just have to throw my diet away for a while. Besides, indulgence is better than diamonds at any place, at any time.

"One Cookies and Cream with extra Vanilla Ice Cream, please!"

For Every Yin

2004-07-14T10:21:00.000+08:00

Everything has a trade off, so it seems.

Yesterday, I went to a VTR for a liquor commercial. I was so excited about doing the VTR because it has been quite a while since I last did one.

The minute I arrived at the agency, something told me that this particular project was not for me. I signed up for the schedule and was greeted by the person in charge. She used to work for the casting agency that first got me to model. In fact, she recalls, she was the one who "discovered" me. Very star-like.

Her initial reaction was, "You seem to have lost a lot of weight." Hint number one: We are looking for someone who is much fatter than you. Why the heck did you lose weight?

"I am not that thin. I am still fat... I still have flabs and love handles," was my reply. I was supposing I could reassure her that I was still cut out for this project.

And so I waited... and waited... and got to talk to a co-"model." I really like that, calling myself a commercial model. Hahahaha.... Anyway, I got a lot of background info on the TVC (TV Commercial) from him. I found out that he was a cousin of a famous athlete/commercial model/schoolmate of mine back in college. And then he was called in.

Urgh! More minutes of agonizing waiting!

And then my name was called. My sweet sounding name! It's my turn to show off! As I entered the room, my new-found friend told me to prepare to strip. I was like, "OK, that won't be a problem."

"Your name please... How old are you Donnell? And your height? OK, look at the camera... now turn to your right.... turn your head to the camera... now smile... OK, now to the left.... turn your head to the camera... now smile... OK. Thank you."

That's it?!? I mean, I was supposed to strip, wasn't I? I was supposed to be this beach blob who will emerge from underwater as a beach hunk, right?

Hint number two: You are not what we are looking for. You are not fat enough. Thank you for you time. If we do have another project, we'll keep you in mind. The one ahead of you is fatter than you. He is perfect for the role.

Disappointing, true. I mean, I have waited all my life for a big break like this, going to Boracay to do a shoot. And now, I lost my only hope of being a commercial model -- being too fat. Now, I am just fat. None of the too there. All because I want to feel great and love my body more.

They say that for every Yin, there is a Yang. For every action, and equal and opposite reaction. Saddening as it is, there is still hope left in me. I might have lost the commercial, but I guess I am also enjoying the fruits of my diet and exercise. Although I still have to wait a couple more months (or years) before I could actually wear speedo bikini-type swimming trunks. There will be other commercials for me, I know. There will be other breaks...

...I hope.

Orca: Forward Looking

2004-07-13T08:38:00.000+08:00

This week is definitely something to look forward to, at least for me.

I am about to close a publication (close being a term for having it released to the printers), an exam to pass, a paper to submit... It is just plain toxic.

But behind all these toxicities in the week, there are actually somethings that I am looking forward to with great anticipation.

This afternoon, I will be on my way to a VTR. It's something unlike the commercial I have done before, where I did play a support character. It is a VTR for an island-hopping TVC. Whatever the product or government agency the VTR will be scouting talents for, only heaven knows. And with heaven, I mean those in the top level of the advertising industry. Hahahaha... Does it give away my awe for the crazy industry called advertising? I suppose so.

My only wish is that I do bag the role for whatever commercial it may be. It has been two months since I last did a commercial (as if it were on a regular basis. Believe me it's not. It was my first and only commercial so far).

I received a text message yesterday informing me about the VTR. They asked me if I knew how to swim. Of course I know how to swim! I was a dolphin in one of my past lives. I was a killer whale almost all my life. It is now that I am enjoying my new role (and size) as a baby orca.

I immediately sent them a reply (or a query) that indeed, I know how to swim, and what outfit is needed, and when is the scheduled shoot. As if I was really the one to bag the role. Hahahaha... Definitely, if shoot will be this weekend, I will not be able to make it as I would be out of town. And the reason I asked for the outfit is because I am scared to be wearing trunks, as in bikini trunks, in public. I only wear those when I am in my own private environment. Talk about psycho! Imagine the reaction of the people if ever they see me in trunks! The ad might be banned by the local regulating body if ever they make me do something like that! Orca for Speedo. Que horror!

Another thing that I am looking forward to is my trip to Baguio this weekend. I will stand as a secondary sponsor in my cousin's wedding. It will be my first time to see Baguio in ages (last trip there was in 2001). At least now, I will get a glimpse of the famous SM Baguio, the most beautiful SM ever built in the country -- so they say. I will get to rummage through the UKs in the city (UK is a term we use for ukay-ukay) and get new wardrobe for my new baby Orca look. I will be able to show my grand aunt that I am now a baby Orca, which is a big difference from the last time she saw me. I mean, I was a blue whale back then, not even an Orca. I will be able to go to places I wasn't able to go to before in Baguio! Isn't it quite obvious that I am really excited about this trip? Naaaah... I don't think so.

There is really much to look forward to this week. But I guess the thing that I am looking forward to the most is this month's salary.

The Sea of Pee

2004-06-30T20:37:00.000+08:00

Have you ever felt the urge to urinate in a very uncomfortable place?

Well, I have... I was snorkling in the clear waters of Boracay when I finally had the urge to do my thing... not that thing, the liquid thing that shoots from my hose. Well, I really had to go badly after drinking much seawater, I had to ask somebody.

So I asked one of the boatmen.

"Diyan na lang ho, sa dagat! Lahat naman ho, diyan na umiihi, eh!"

Imagine my surprise at his reply! I am practically swimming in a sea of urine! And to think I drank some seawater, giving me the urge to urinate! Well, there's urine therapy for me!

And so I tried to pee in the water... I forced my bladder once... twice... the mere knowledge of me swimming in a sea of pee, drinking sea pee, snorting sea pee... that really freaked my bladder out into embarassment. Plus, of course, I was embarassed... peeing there in front of my relatives and their relatives. It might have been good if I were with some unknown boatmen... but no... these were blood relatives!

And then it came. I finally was able to pee! Success! I can now officially say that I have already swam in my own pee! It's like saying that I'm drenched in my own blood. Hoo, boy! That was something else... Suddenly, the cool Boracay water around me became as warm as my body.

The only thing that kept my mind from being so freaked out by the thing I just did is that I am in water.... my urine is clean.... and that water in urine makes a solution of urinary water measured in parts per trillion, that is there is only one part of urine in a trillion gallons of sea water.

One word of caution, though. One should never do this in a swimming pool or in a jacuzzi. Now, that would be a different story.

The Boracay Sexcapade: Vol. 2

2004-06-28T13:34:00.000+08:00

Day 2.

Still no babes in sight... Still no sun in the sky... When will heaven come to me?

Unlike the first day, however, this day was more eventful.

I woke up, had a couple of Mars in the toilet (remember my jamming-mate?), and proceeded to have my breakfast with my aunt and cousin and their relatives. Well, my first big laugh came when my aunt's niece told me of a story about her father ordering breakfast. The story goes like this...

"Good morning, sir! What do you want for breakfast?"

"I'll have bacon and eggs please."

"How would you like your eggs done, sir?"

"Upside down please."

Of course, he intended to say sunny-side up. The funny thing is, when his order came, it was flipped upside down!

Big laugh for breakfast - not bad! This story joins the ranks of my dad ordering bottomless iced tea, referring to it as "bottoms up iced tea," or my mom referring to sack race as sack rice.

Then we went snorkling. That was actually my first time to snorkle! I got to see the wonders of the sea and even manage to spot a blue starfish, which my cousin scooped up for us to get a photo of. During the trip, I had another laugh with another story of the same guy which goes...

"Son, somebody gave me some money, which I am giving to you. It is in a currency foreign to me but I think it translates to a million bucks."

"Thanks, mom! I'll go look it up in some banks and check whether they actually exchange this currency."

So the guy went to some banks, got a hold of several connections, to no avail. Finally, he went to the Central Bank.

"I've been to several banks and they could not identify this currency. I would like to have this exchanged, please."

"Sir, we're not familiar with that currency as well, although I could have it checked for you."

"Thanks!"

"Sir, please take a seat for a while. We had this currency checked. Did you say you've been around town for a while checking for this currency, wanting to have it changed?"

"Definitely! I'd even give you a little amount as a gesture of thanks if and wehn I have it changed."

Of course, at this point, he really thought that it was worth thousands, if not millions worth of local currency.

"Sir, I am afraid I have to break this to you. The equivalent of the amount you want to have exchanged is 150 pesos."

The guy imagined himself running from the bank in shame. All he could say was thank you, with sweat forming at the edge of his eyebrows.

Something funny to cap a nice snorkling adventure in the rain.

When the rain stopped a bit, we had the opportunity to ride a banana boat, which was really fun. There were no comedic quips during the ride though. It was just pure enjoyment.

We then went back to our hotel rooms. My cousin and I went around shopping for local products. One of the shops I checked was a bead shop. I asked the saleslady how much the beads were.

"Sir, that forty. Per na po yan."

I was like, "Come on! This isn't pearl obviously! It is made of clam shells! How can this be pearl?" But being the kind person that I was, I asked, "Could you say that again please?"

"Per na po."

I simply forgot where I was. Of course she meant pair. I really wanted to burst out laughing, but then again, I might be beaten up by a swarm of Visayans in the area.

That night, I had a henna tattoo, I walked down the night beach, with strong winds in tow, and ended up, again, in Wave. Planning to get hitched that night, I started to look around for any foreigners or any kind of babe. Unfortunately, being the lean or off-peak season, all I spotted were some matronic beauties waiting for willing patrons... Well, that's life! If you can't get hitched, you CAN'T get hitched!

I therefore conclude that the Boracay Sexcapade is just a myth, at least in my books. Time will come when I have saved enough money to actually go there during peak season. Maybe, by then, the Boracay Sexcapade will materialize into something real. Until then...

The Boracay Sexcapade: Vol. 1

2004-06-28T13:05:00.000+08:00

I woke up pretty early in anticipation of what was supposed to be the perfect getaway for what was a very sleepy week for me. I thought, "Hey! I could bask in the sun all day, rev up for some babe watching and probably get hitched there!"

And then it started to rain...

We boarded a nineteen-seater propeller plane and waited in anticipation of the beach's grandeur... white sands... sunny weather. Well, we hoped we would have a sunny weather then... It was all rainy in the Metro and we really wanted to enjoy Boracay very much. I thought that maybe, the rains only affected where we were then...

But I was wrong.

We arrived at Caticlan with overcast clouds... a very gloomy start, I should say... We arrived at the actual island and it was raining cats and dogs! So much for the sunny weather! Waves were crashing like hell on the shoreline. The wind was blowing like mad! Plastic signs were being thrown off base. It was really chaotic.

What was there to do? Well, we checked in our rooms and, wearing a water-resistant jacket, my cousin and I strolled along the alley of Stations 1, 2 and 3. We got to see the restaurants but the whole place was like a deserted island!

Where did all the babes go? Where did all the people go?

"Times like these," I thought. "I need a Juicy!"

So I just spent the day walking around in the rain, surfing the internet, going into a disco called Wave (where most of the patrons are matrons waiting to get hitched by foreigners), walking again, watching cable, walking again... and sleeping.

Fun, huh?

If only I offered some eggs to St. Claire before I left for the beach...

The Morning Stretch

2004-06-21T13:22:00.000+08:00

I rarely stretch in the mornings. Upon waking up, I stand up with my eyes half closed and go directly to the bathroom to brush my teeth and do my thing (while half asleep).

This morning was quite different.

Last night, I instantaneously fell asleep after several reps of crunches in bed... I don't know why but all of a sudden, upon waking up, I had this great urge to stretch...

"Uuuuunnnngggghhhhh!"

And that's when it happened. I don't know why it was but something in me locked like the vaults of Citibank! My abs started to contract like wild! I had the most severe case of abdominal cramps in years! I mean, the last time I had them was three years back, immediately after doing some crunches in the gym.

Believe it or not, I was immobile for like an hour. No one could hear me because the slightest word I utter makes my tummy contract some more! Ugh! The pain of it!

Now, there are still some remnants of those muscle pain. I just needed to rest it off for a while before I could actually do another set of crunches again.

So I have this dilemma... lose my tummy or lose my job (yep, I was on half-day leave... again). I really don't know, but I think I'll have to just get used to the cramps for a while so that I will be able to outgrow it (if that ever happens), or outshrink it, whatever the case may be.

Enjoy Your Meal, Sir!

2004-06-18T09:39:00.000+08:00

What a great day to start the end of the work-week!

I went to McDonald's with two of my friends to grab something to eat. After ordering and getting what I ordered for, my friend, who was behind me, took his turn to order.

"One Raging Chicken Burger."

"Sir, I'm sorry, we don't serve that until after 10 am. We only serve breakfast at this time."

"OK, then. Never mind."

And so he turned his back and we were about to leave when...

"Thank you sir! Enjoy your meal!"

What the hell was that? What meal is there to enjoy? Raging Air Burger? Is everything in McDonald's pre-programmed? I mean, it really gave me a good laugh, and on a Friday morning! It's like how they say, "Twenty, your change sir!" Doesn't it sound weird? They could say, "Your change sir is twenty... one... two... three....... twenty! Thank you sir, enjoy your meal!"

We did ENJOY our walk back to the office sans the meal. Thanks to the robotesque cashiers of McDonald's.

Weaoua!!!

2004-06-18T09:15:00.000+08:00

About two nights back, I had a three-hour badminton game, which ended in exhaustion and... yup, starvation. I was so hungry that night I might have eaten 5 big macs in one go!

So I went with a couple of friends to a 24-hour Chinese restaurant and I ate quite a lot: tofu, lemon chicken, still more tofu, some japanese dimsum... it was really a heavy dinner. And to top all that, I had two kettles, not cups, of house tea. I felt so bloated it seemed that I gained 60 pounds that night. Talk about waste! I just let 3 hours of good exercise flow down the drain of food trip!

And so I went home, feeling all chub chub once again ("The light is so beautiful, mommy! I'm being drawn closer to the light!). And as if my conscience and self-determination were both asleep that day, probably too exhausted from the game, I ate some spring rolls which I saw on our dining table... They were waiting for me! They welcomed me with such grandeur that I wasn't able to resist their cries for acceptance. After those spring rolls, I figured I needed some fiber. So I downed 4 oranges. FOUR ORANGES!!! By that time, I really felt like I was about to explode!

Hmmmm... At that time, I thought to myself, "Why not do a little Bulimic Experiment? How does it feel like to be bulimic?" So I locked myself in the toilet for like ages, tickling my throat with my finger (I am just wondering how those blow jobbing queers and queens to so without having that gag reflex), excreting a few mL of saliva every now and then... until finally...

"Weaoua!!!"

Yep, that is the funny sound I make whenever I do get to vomit (which is not that often). I succeeded in making myself puke! I am now a certified bulimic! Hahahaha.... And it actually felt good! So I tried it again, because I felt that there were way too much foodstuff in my system at that time. In fact I tried it three times! The thing is, after the third go, it didn't feel nice anymore! I didn't like the taste of acid regurgitating in my throat... nor the fluid that goes back to my nasal passage... nor the sight of my last meal mashed together and plopping like blobs of bird droppings on the toilet bowl.

I needed to jam with Mar again... I needed her badly! Who cares if my parents are asleep in the other room? Who cares if the house will stink of Mar's essence? Who cares if... well, I guess everybody's asleep that time so I just snuck out of the house and reminisce the ups and downs of my bulimic experience.

I'm on Drugs

2004-06-15T12:36:00.000+08:00

I have been swamped by questions on how I got slimmer lately. No, I'm not bragging about my weight loss. In fact, I still need to lose around 20-30 pounds more to be able to reach my ideal weight. It's just that I was so humongous before (at a whopping 235 pounds in a 5'6" frame) that people just couldn't believe I was able to do it. Maybe because I had lingered in that weight range for so long that is why many deem me a hopeless case.

Some of my close friend who I haven't seen for about a month went as far as accusing me of taking Bangkok Pills, phentermine, ephedra, and all the weight loss regimens. Unfortunatley, I couldn't take any of those supplements (or drugs) because of a family history of heart disease, not to mention occasional palpitations, which I dare not mention to my doctor (otherwise, it will be bye-bye Mar). Besides, these pills cost quite a sum of money, which, incidentally, I don't have much of.

Other close friends have branded me as anorexic. How can I be when I still binge every now and then (think smorgasborg) and eat ice cream by the pint? My wallet may be anorexic, with the very limited inflow of cash and unlimited outflow of it.

The formula for me is simple. I started with a no-rice regimen. All that I take in are just viands, with occasional helping of bread and pasta on the side. It is not really Atkin's Diet because I still have my weekly dose of carbs.

The next phase was when I swore sodas off from my system. Yup, not even Diet Coke. I used to believe that drinking Diet Coke is ok, since it is only "one calorie, sugar free, Diet Coca-Cola!" My friend told me otherwise. From then on, I saw my weight decrease rather drastically.

And then I started engaging myself in badminton. I would have at least three two-hour session in a week. If I get lucky, I'd play four times. I was really determined to sweat all the fat off. Besides, I really do enjoy the game, it being a social sport and all. I got in touch with my high school friends, bonded more with my cousins, and widened my circle of office friends through this weight-loss sport. It is just so unfortunate that many birds had to die just to make me lose weight (poor birds).

About a few weeks back, another friend introduced me to the idea of going to the gym. I go to the gym now when I don't have badminton games to attend to. I don't lift weights... I just use the treadmill and the stationary bike most of the time, and a few minutes are spent in the crunch machine each session. Adn the most relaxing part of all -- the sauna. I really like the feel of perspiring a lot after a long workout.

So that is what I did, and still do, to lose weight. I am just not sure how long I need to do these things before I do reach my ideal weight. However, I won't be stopping these activities once I do get there. I need to maintain my weight and feel good about myself for life. As my friends said, losing weight the effective way is by changing my lifestyle as a whole.

It's quite a long talk if I have to say all of these things to the people who ask me how I lost weight. Now, whenever someone poses that question to me, I simply say, "I'm on drugs!"

This: A Point In Case

2004-06-14T12:49:00.000+08:00

Talk about a fast weekend. I almost didn't feel it. Imagine, having to go on overtime on a Saturday for nothing, and playing 3 hours of badminton on a Sunday... My weekend was totally exhausting.

Before I went to bed last night, I was actually thinking of how great this week might turn out. I was looking forward to doing things that will be extraordinarilly fun, of being with people whose company I really enjoy, of being able to be with my jamming-mate Mar. But as they say, don't count your eggs before they are in one basket. I hope I got that right (wink*wink).

Fortune of fortunes, I never thought that I would be starting this week with a few disappoinments... disappointing cases that will alter the course of this week forever.

Case in Point #1: The Co-worker

I mentioned that last Saturday, instead of doing something, I ended up doing nothing. All because of a co-worker, whose work happens to be a precedent of mine. After agreeing to at last do the work on Monday morning, I came in only to find out that the work can't be done until the afternoon. This is efficiency at work... On the brighter side, at least I now have enough time for blog.

Case in Point #2: The Vanishing Finances

I just got my salary last Saturday and it is depleting like methanol exposed to air. What's more, I found out that my special group of "friends" are planning a trip to Hong Kong by next week, and I cannot do anything but watch them plan for their weekend getaway in dismay. Of course, I can't join them, with my few bucks left to be stretched for the entire month. Besides, I have tons of loans to pay (priceless). I can't blame them if they want to have fun. And I can't dictate upon them to wait until such time that I do get enough money to join them for the trip. So what if they want to leave without me? This only means more blogging time for me, right?

Case in Point #3: The Dying Voice

Over the weekend, I saw to it that I practiced karaoke at home to prepare for Tuesday night. Unfortunately, the karaoke night has been cancelled and I am left with no choice but to sing in the shower again. Alas, no one will be able to hear my Mondegreens and soulful rendition of She Bangs a la William Hung this week. I dunno, but it seems like I'll be doing a He Bangs this week... He Bangs his head on the wall too hard he died. At least I have Tuesday night for blogging again.

It was really good that I was able to watch Titanic last night. At least I don't feel like I'm the only one who's sinking. "Promise me Rose, you're going to hold on. Hold on to that promise. You're gonna be an old woman and have many babies. You're not going to die here, not tonight."

I know it's too early in the week to wallow in disappointment. But who can help it? If your environment is as murky as mine, you'd be a fish swimming in the most polluted waters in the world! "Where's the lucky fin?" I'd probably be screamin' "What lucky fin are you talking about? I'm a hermaphroditic fish! Half fish and half clam!" Now that's just angst talking.

The Cliffhanger

2004-06-14T01:20:00.000+08:00

Have you ever seen that movie where Sylvester Stallone frantically tries to save somebody from falling off a cliff (or an icy edge of a mountain)? Well, I haven't. But I heard the title is Cliffhanger. It was so humorously parodied in the movie Ace Ventura, Pet Detective, when Mr. Ventura actually tried to save a raccoon, to no avail. Pitiful movie.

Well, this story of mine had nothing to do with those movies. Hahahaha... Talk about silly beginnings... I have a cliffhanger story of my own, and it doesn't involve mountains. It involves a little something that I won't mention until later.

I was having tea this afternoon with my cousin and his friend. We were laughing our hearts out until he pointed out that I had a cliffhanger. I really didn't have any idea what he meant by that. It was quite cryptic for me until he made a small gesture. I bet you can guess what I am talking about by this time. This is later.

I asked him what he meant by the cliffhanger, and he pointed straight at his nostril. Imagine my embarassment, and in front of his friend! So now I know that cliffhanger=exposed booger. Man, oh man! I can still feel blood rushing to my face out of shame.

At least no one else saw my little cliffhanger. Or so I think... I talked with a lot of people the entire day and I really am not sure how long my little friend had been clinging on to his precious life. Maybe they thought it was a protruding mole. Or maybe a green tumor. Or maybe... whatever. One thing is for sure, though. I'll never look at Sylvester Stallone the same way again.

Why Blog?

2004-06-14T01:09:00.000+08:00

What really is a blog? Why blog?

To be quite frank, I really don't know what blog means and why I came up with one of my own. It was just a heaven-sent answer to my persistent narcoleptic attacks in the office. Probably that's why it's called blog. Like, when heaven sent it, it dropped right in front of my face with a sound, "BLOG!"

Or blog could possibly be the sound I make whenever my head falls on my desk after each narcoleptic attack. Take for instance the other day. I was typing something when my eyelids started to fall... and then.... BLOG! I bumped my head on my desk.

Or blog could probably just be the sound I make whenever I fall off my chair after reading some blog postings in another site (http://orangeexpress.blogspot.com). Now this blogger is very hilarious, I should say. And with my weight, there is no doubt I would be making that "BLOG" sound after hitting the floor.

Or blog could probably be the person writing blogs... In the Filipino vernacular, blog sounds a lot like kalog, itlog, bilog, uhog, words that may mean nothing to many people, but may otherwise be very descriptive of me.

Whatever blog means, I am having fun right now, wracking my fingers like hell, feeding this computer with random thoughts and random words before I fall to sleeeeeeppppppppppppppppppp.............................BLOG!

Wedding Bells and Separation Spells

2004-06-11T13:02:00.000+08:00

I just had "lunch" with a classmate of mine in Graduate School. Of course, when I say lunch, I mean my usual noon dose of nicotine and carbon monoxide and other harmful toxins. Now, this particular friend of mine got hitched last December, and fortunately or unfortunately, they have no child yet (Hmmm.... should I rephrase that to she isn't pregnant yet?). I asked her why and she said that it's all because she still has school, and, if added with a dash of child rearing, will definitely cause her life to go haywire.

I also asked her how the first few months of their married life had been. She replied that sometimes, she wanted to ask permission from her husband if she could go back to her mother's place.

Which brings me to another story about another friend who just got separated from her husband of a few years. I asked why, and her reply was quite astonishing, or amusing, or... I dunno, I actually have mixed emotions about it. "It just didn't work. There is no love there."

Mushy, huh?

Anyway, it got my mind thinking again about my own love life (which, as of my latest tally, still at ZERO). Do I really ever want to get married? Will the girl I marry be there til death do us part? How long will we last if we do part ways?

I don't hear wedding bells in my near future, not just yet. Hopefully, I will be able to find her and experience the ups and downs of married life some time in the future. But hey, wait a minute, Mr. Postman! Before I think about getting hitched, I need to check on my financial status first! Well, uh, bank account... zero; home savings... zero; mastery of poverty... priceless.

In any case, I have my future ahead of me (who doesn't? That's why it's called the future because it is ahead, dumb ass!). Who knows, I might win the next American Idol title and get enough record deals to get enough funds for settling down. Hmmm.... if only I could get a girlfriend before that time comes.

The Ice Man and the Kink

2004-06-11T09:57:00.000+08:00

I need to keep myself busy.

For a reason I don't understand, it has been a week now in this office, and it seems that there is very sporadic work to be done (I am speaking for myself here). The environmental conditions don't help a bit as the air conditioner blasts the Siberian wind on my small igloo. I feel my hand getting numb by the nanosecond, hence, I need to write something in this spot of mine just to keep the blood flowing in my fingers.

It really is so damn cold. I don't know, but I guess my mind is just numb from this cold as well... Thoughts of burning the books I have beside me just to generate heat run through my frozen mind right now. Or I could ask someone to give me natural body heat... now isn't that something? If only someone here was kinky enough...

Hmmmm.... Kinky. I've always thought that when you say someone is kinky, that someone is very curly, as in African curly. I am just wondering how it was related to someone who is sexily flirtatious. The possibilities could be endless, although I have some postulates in mind. It might be possible that kinky evolved from the word pinky, which practically describes the color of, well, you name it. I mean, many men find pink body parts very attractive. However, since pinky might mean pinky finger, it was changed to kinky, which is also descriptive of the strands of you know what down there (have you ever seen straight ones? Come on!).

Whew! That was something! At least, now, I feel a little warmth surging through me. Now, I have to look for something else to do. Excuse me.

Living on a Twenty

2004-06-11T00:23:00.000+08:00

What do you do with a 20?

I was just planning how I would be spending my day tomorrow and noticed that I only have a 20 in my billfold. Yup, it's quite a lot... if you lived in the 1800s. Now, two questions are hogging my grey matter: How do I get more money to survive tomorrow, and, in the event that I don't get more money, how do I survive on a 20?

In a society where everything needs to be bought, a 20 will never go a long way... if you are not creative enough. Here is a list of strategic plans I have concocted to actually stretch my 20 to its limits:

1. Travel to the office... hitch with my sister (Free)
2. Work til noon... (Free)
3. Smoke a few cigs... ask from my buddies (Free)
4. Have lunch... or might as well look at people having lunch (Free)
5. Work until 5... (Free)
6. Work out in the gym... (Free)
7. Travel going home... (15)

A second alternative for item 7 is hitch a ride with some people (Again, Free!).

Now, considering that I have already laid out a plan for tomorrow, it is quite obvious that I may not be able to spend anything the entire day. One question bothers me though. How am I going to spend my 20?

A Comedy of Errors

2004-06-10T13:32:00.000+08:00

I woke up this morning with a quirky smirk on my face. I don't really know why. Maybe because I ended yesterday with thoughts on misheard lyrics, or mondegreens. One of my all-time favorites is that of the Whitney Houston hit, The Greatest Love of All. Imagine hearing this melody in your mind... "I decided long ago, never to walk with Edu Manzano, if I fail, if I'm sixteen, at least I live as I believe..."

Imagine my amazement when my good friend forwarded the kissthisguy.com URL to me this morning and found out that there are a whole lot more misheard lyrics throughout the globe. It really had me rolling with laughter (at least I was rolling on the floor in my mind).

And then there it was, staring me right on the face... an email from our HR manager. Imagine my shock when I read that one of the managers was supposed to handle a new personnel, "once she is ready." It was so shockingly funny, I almost fell off my seat. Imagine a manager for decades not being ready to handle a new staff. And the funnier thing is that the same HR Manager sent another email with all of the information from the first email still intact except for that portion on the Manager's readiness. Discreetly done!

Life is just full of surprises--surprises that get funnier by the second. I bet you have your own Mondegreens and email booboos too. This is, after all, a perfect world... a paerfectly funny world. I'll leave you with a few mondegreens (hint: search for the origin of this term, you will be quite amused) gathered from my friends...

Say you, say we, say it together (Say You, Say Me)

Looks like a lady (Looks like we made it... from You're Still the One)

Why do you build me up? Barnacle, baby just to let me down (Build me up, buttercup)

Do you have to, do you have to lick your finger (Linger)

You know I've got some food for you (Linger)

Like a knight in shining armor, tamalong tamago (Glory of Love)

Mirror, mirror I wish you collide to me (Mirror, Mirror)

Life is a Guessing Game

2004-06-09T16:57:00.000+08:00

I have just noticed how I end my posts with sentences starting with "I guess" or with that phrase being somewhere in that sentence. It is just funny how it reflects my views in life, that life is nothing but a guessing game. You will never really know what you are going to get, how you will be feeling tomorrow, who you are going to meet. One thing is for sure, though. I will be guessing more stuff about my future in the days to come.

Photographs of Me

2004-06-09T16:41:00.000+08:00

I have been staring at a few photographs of myself here in my desktop for quite a few minutes now and I can't help but wonder why I am so egotistical in my ways. I seem to be fascinated by the way I look, by the changes that I have undergone (diet and badminton did that for me), and many other things about me. But then I start to look deeper into each photograph and I noticed that it's either I am the only one on it, or I am with a group of friends. Not one, zero, nada, not one of these pictures showed me with someone that I like, someone I could cuddle with in a cold, rainy night.

It is a sad fact that I am still single... and it is being reflected strongly in these photographs that I am looking at. It is unfortunate to be single at my age, considering that the male species are said to do the hunting. If I had lived several thousands of years back, I wouldn't have survived the Ice Age, simply because hunting is a game of survival of the fittest and the wittiest. And that is actually what I am looking at now. Smiles of a caveman frozen in ice. Each smile radiates a certain something that is quite ironic... something melancholic... a smile that exhudes loneliness. Behind the twinkling, chinky eyes are expressions of melodrama.

But why be sad? I know that sooner or later, I will learn the game well enough to bag a "hunted" of my own. It will just be a matter of time before I will have someone to cuddle with, someone to kiss, someone to share fun memories with... memories that can only be captured in the film of my memory and not by some silly photograph that I will stare at when I have nothing to do. For now, I guess I will just have to wait.

Idle Mind, Idle Hands

2004-06-09T14:37:00.000+08:00

It is a day of being idle. It seems that I haven't done anything purposeful today except come up with this blog. Funny because there are tons of things to do and I can't seem to get my idle hands and idle mind to do something meaningful.

Somewhere in my bloodstream, I can feel the urge that I need something to consume... this comes after my eventful snack of Tortillos, a chocolate bar called Safari, a bag of cashew nuts, and a pack of crackers. Damn! And to think I'm trying to lose about 30 pounds. Is someone out there pregnant who just happened to brush off her cravings on my poor dieting self? Or, as my medical examination results so erroneously put it, maybe I am pregnant! Now that is a first, that is, in the family. Hahaha... Come to think of it, I may look like a pregnant male simply because I am artistically round.

At least, for some time there, my jaws weren't as idle as my mind and my hands. They say that this is probably just the calm before the storm. The thing I am fearing most is that tomorrow, I might be swamped with work, both school work and work work. But until then, I guess I'll just let my hand bask in the idleness of the afternoon and my mind travel in the universe that I aptly call the void.

Through Smoky Air

2004-06-09T13:41:00.000+08:00

And so it was that I spent another lunch out with my best friend, Mar L. Boro. Nothing much has changed since the last time we jammed, except that she has regenerated into this practically new being. Ha! And to think I already threw her ashes into the river Nile just last night. Talk about speedy recovery.

What makes Mar unique is that she is able to relay to me a message that no one else can relay well enough--that one day soon, I'm going to end up in ashes, or dust, whatever you want to call it. Believe me, jamming with Mar is very liberating. Yeah, you could say that she is the "air that I breathe."

It just passed my mind a few seconds ago... when do I actually part ways with my best friend? After all, nothing in this world is constant but change. Will I be suffering from separation anxiety both physically and emotionally? I hate to break the news to you but I don't see this happening in the near future. Not just yet. Until then, I guess I'll just be enjoying my lunch outs with this chick, and a few others who have enjoyed Mar's company to the butt.